how to make myself a better version of me essay

Essay on Self Improvement

Students are often asked to write an essay on Self Improvement in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Self Improvement

What is self improvement.

Self-improvement is when you make yourself better. You can do this in many different ways. It could be learning a new thing, changing a bad habit, or becoming kinder. It’s about making positive changes to yourself.

Why is Self Improvement Important?

Self-improvement is important because it helps us grow. It helps us become better people. When we improve ourselves, we feel happier and more confident. We can do more things and achieve our goals.

How to Start Self Improvement?

To start self-improvement, you need to think about what you want to change. You might want to learn a new skill or stop a bad habit. Then, you make a plan and start working on it.

Tips for Self Improvement

Here are some tips for self-improvement: set clear goals, be patient, and keep going even when it’s hard. Also, remember to reward yourself when you achieve your goals. This will keep you motivated.

Also check:

250 Words Essay on Self Improvement

Self Improvement is the act of making yourself better. It’s about learning new things and getting rid of bad habits. It’s like planting a seed and taking care of it until it grows into a big, strong tree.

Self Improvement is important because it helps us grow and become better people. It’s like climbing a ladder. Each step we take brings us closer to the top. We learn new things, become better at what we do, and feel happier. It’s a journey that never ends.

Starting Self Improvement is easy. First, think about what you want to improve. It could be anything. Maybe you want to read more books, or learn a new skill, or be kinder to people. Then, make a plan. Write down what you want to do and how you will do it. And then, start doing it. It’s as simple as that.

Challenges in Self Improvement

Self Improvement can be hard. Sometimes, we might feel like giving up. But remember, every step counts. Even small changes can make a big difference. And if you keep going, you will get better. It’s like a journey. There might be bumps along the way, but in the end, you will reach your destination.

500 Words Essay on Self Improvement

Understanding self-improvement.

Self-improvement is the process of making yourself a better person. It is about learning new things, developing new skills, and becoming a better version of yourself. It can include many things like learning a new language, improving your physical health, or becoming a better listener.

The Importance of Self-Improvement

Self-improvement is important for many reasons. It can help you achieve your goals, make you feel good about yourself, and improve your life in general. For example, if you want to become a better student, you might focus on improving your study habits. This could include things like setting aside more time for studying, learning new study techniques, or finding a study group to join.

Ways to Improve Yourself

Another way to improve yourself is to learn new skills. This could be anything from learning how to cook a new recipe, to learning how to play a musical instrument, to learning how to code. Learning new skills can be fun and rewarding, and it can also help you become a more well-rounded person.

Challenges in Self-Improvement

While self-improvement can be rewarding, it can also be challenging. Sometimes, it can be hard to stick to your goals, especially if they are big and take a long time to achieve. It can also be hard to find the time to work on self-improvement, especially if you have a busy schedule.

The Role of Patience in Self-Improvement

Patience plays a key role in self-improvement. It’s important to remember that change takes time. You won’t become a better person overnight. It takes time, effort, and patience. But with persistence, you can make progress and see improvements in yourself.

In conclusion, self-improvement is a lifelong journey. It’s about setting goals, learning new skills, and overcoming challenges. It’s about becoming a better version of yourself, one step at a time. So, keep moving forward, keep learning, and keep improving. The journey of self-improvement is a rewarding one, and it’s a journey that’s worth taking.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

If you’re looking for more, here are essays on other interesting topics:

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3 Steps to Becoming a Better Version of Yourself

I recently finished reading 99U’s new book Maximize Your Potential (which I can’t recommend enough), and it ended with a lovely little essay by Jack Cheng about the “Better You.”

The idea of the essay is that there is always a version of yourself slightly ahead of where you are now. This “you” isn’t perfect, but he or she is a little more organized, gets up a little earlier , is a little better at focusing on the task at hand. It’s the person you know you could be if you just tried a little harder. It’s not scary impossible, but you’ll have to push to get there.

I loved this idea of a better me sitting next to me at work and pushing me to achieve my potential. For the next week or so, I would think with every move I made—what would better me do?

But even with a nice metaphor like this, keeping up with your better self is not an easy task. It takes hard work and persistence, and it’s easy to just want to revert to your self that hits the snooze button a couple of times and hops over to Pinterest for “just five minutes” in the middle of the workday.

To help you (and myself) out in this quest for continual self-improvement, I’ve come up with a couple of strategies that make staying on track with my better self a little easier.

1. Break the Norm

Sometimes you already know the changes you want to make in your life. But sometimes, it’s not as clear what behaviors are holding you back from your full potential.

The best way to figure it out? Start trying different things. Make a list of productivity tips you’ve read about or friends’ behaviors you’ve been wanting to try, and challenge yourself to do things differently. It doesn’t have to be big things: If you usually get up and check your phone, instead get up and relax for five minutes to start the day fresh . If you usually check your email first thing when you get to the office, instead try spending an hour working on your big task for the day first.

Not every change you make will be one you want to continue, but experimenting like this will start to give you a sense of what’s holding you back and what will help you move toward the better version of you.

2. Do it Regularly for a Month

Oftentimes when people get excited about improving themselves, they’ll think about all the things they want to do differently and make it a goal to change them all at once. I fall prey to this far too often, too— this week, I’m going to stay organized at work, devote time to side projects, eat healthier, and actually exercise . It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what happens in this scenario: Monday I’m gung-ho for all of them, but by mid-week I’m back to my old ways.

Changing habits is hard, but it’s nearly impossible when we overwhelm ourselves with too many changes at once. Instead, it’s better to focus on one major change at a time, and give yourself ample time to establish this change as a habit. I find the most effective way to do this is to practice the new habit every day for a month. Even if you aren’t looking for this to be a daily habit in the long run, doing it every day at the start makes it easer to condition the behavior as a regular part of your life. Scott Young explains this well in his article on 99U .

For example, over the summer I was working out approximately never. I wanted to get to the point where I was active three or four days a week, so I made it a goal to work out every day in September. By spending a month focusing on how working out could fit into my life every single day, doing it a few times a week is now a piece of cake.

This could apply to things at work, too. Want to start devoting more time to special projects at work? Devoting even 15 to 30 minutes a day to these projects for a month can help get you there. It may feel like slow progress, but in just a year of doing one thing a month, you’ll be closer to your better self in 12 major ways.

3. Give Yourself a Performance Review

Nothing makes a goal fail faster than not keeping yourself accountable. It’s all well and good to say you’ll wake up half an hour earlier every day, but if you’re not checking in on yourself, you’ll probably start hitting the snooze button again before you know it.

So, set up a regular time to check in with yourself on your goal. Every evening, once a week—whatever cadence you think you need to stay on track. Sit down and think about what you’ve been doing well and where your weaknesses have been, and then come up with action items for how you’re going to overcome them. Better yet, write them down so you can keep up with your progress .

And if you’re still having trouble staying on track, find someone else to help you stay accountable. It could be your roommate, your best friend, or even your boss. For example, I had a goal to start writing more. After sharing it with my boss, we set up regular times during my work week that were blocked out for writing, and she checks in with me at the beginning of each of those times to see what I’m working on that day. She’s even started joining me in this writing time—meaning we’re both making progress towards our better selves.

All of this is not to say that you should be constantly self-critiquing and never be happy with where you are in your development. But when you do find ways you can change your habits to make your life a little easier? These strategies will do wonders.

Photo of man smiling courtesy of Shutterstock .

Be the best version of you

How to be the best version of yourself.

We live in a fast-paced world. We’re always searching for the next big thing, and we always want more than what we have. Yet lately there’s been a trend toward looking inward for fulfillment rather than outward. We want experiences over possessions. We want flexibility over income. And we want to focus on becoming who we really are.

What does it mean to be the best version of yourself? Does it mean living up to your potential – or is there more to it?

If you’re like most people, these are the questions you’ve pondered as you search for identity, confidence and fulfillment in life . When the answers you find fall short of your expectations, you need to start asking the really important questions that lead you to understand how to maximize personal growth and be the best version of you.

Crush your limiting beliefs to become the best version of yourself

WHAT DRIVES YOU TO BECOME THE BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF?

Authentic self-discovery isn’t easy. It takes courage and tenacity. To approach your essential self, you must turn away from distracting false beliefs that cloud or distort your self-perception. You need to reveal what drives you – not superficial things like money or power, but what really drives you. Your ultimate purpose in life.

If you’re feeling anxious about self-improvement, remember: Every person is completely unique. Someone else’s life path cannot be your benchmark of success, since they have different dreams, passions and skills. There is also no roadmap or ideal outcome in life, because everyone’s path is theirs and theirs alone.

Ultimately, what drives your decisions – and the key to becoming best version of yourself – are your values and your standards. Your values make you who you are, but your standards define what you’re willing to accept in life. Will you accept being anything less than your authentic, incredible, powerful self?

IDENTIFYING YOUR VALUES

Before you can be the best version of yourself, you must uncover your essential “you-ness” – the values, interests and passions that define who you are in life and the world. Have a conversation with yourself just like you’d have on a first date. Pretend that your ideal self is sitting there with you and ask that person: What activities do you enjoy? Who do you enjoy being around? What impact do you want to make on the world? What is your happiest memory? Be sincere and honest in your answers. 

As you continue the conversation, pay attention to your feelings. If you notice “negative” emotions like anxiety or anger, you’re probably telling yourself subtle negative messages that obscure your conversation. Dig deeper into what’s driving the feeling. Are you afraid you’ll fail at finding yourself? Are you afraid of what you’ll find when you dig deep?

As tempting as it is to feel inadequate, the truth is that each of us is fully complete just the way we are. It’s getting in touch with this essential self that will free you to be the best version of you.

Once you’ve identified the person you want to be, you can plan how to become the best version of yourself. Start with the end in mind – your ideal self – and take concrete steps to get there. 

1. LET GO OF LIMITING BELIEFS

You know who you are – but do you know who you could be? Most of us are held back by limiting beliefs : untrue thoughts we have about our intrinsic nature. By learning to recognize and let go of whatever limiting beliefs are keeping you from becoming the best version of yourself, you’re able to push forward and find the person you really are.

2. TURN YOUR “SHOULDS” INTO “MUSTS”

To be the best version of yourself, you need to live with no regrets. You need to get out of your comfort zone , take risks and fail – yes, fail – so that you can get back up again and succeed. Stop telling yourself what you “should” do and start doing it. Use what Tony calls the rocking chair test. Imagine yourself old and gray, reflecting on your life. What are you most proud of? What do you most regret? This will reveal your “musts.”

3. AMPLIFY YOUR STRENGTHS

Focus on your strengths and you’ll get even stronger in those areas, becoming more fully yourself along the way. Focusing on your strengths is also essential when you hit roadblocks – which you inevitably will. When you amplify your strengths , you remember what you’re bringing to the table, and you’ll crush the obstacles in your path.

4. DEVELOP A GROWTH MINDSET

No one is made up of only strengths. We all have pain points that require attention if you want to be the best version of yourself. Successful people tackle this by having a growth mindset . They believe that there are no weaknesses. There are only opportunities for improvement. Rather than focusing on what they do badly, they focus on how they can improve – and take action to get there.

5. THROW OUT EXPECTATIONS

Our beliefs create our world – but unfortunately, sometimes our beliefs are not our own. Like most of us, you’ve built at least part of your identity on others’ expectations. The process of internalizing others’ values was unconscious, and bringing it to consciousness is the essence of learning how to be the best version of yourself. Your vision for who you want to be must be yours – no one else’s.

6. BE WILLING TO SHED YOUR OLD IDENTITY

When you determine to find your ideal self, you’re essentially raising the bar – for yourself and the people you know. Your “old self” will resist this due to feelings of insecurity and fear of the unknown. Resist the urge to cling to the familiar – the identity that’s been holding you back – and embrace a can-do attitude.

7. TAME YOUR FEARS

Fear is an insidious adversary that robs us of our courage and distracts us from the present moment. Taming your fears is possible, and is necessary to better yourself. When you feel anxious , identify what you’re afraid of and write it down. Then, write down an alternative explanation that’s less scary while still being realistic. Even if your feelings don’t change right away, your mind will register the rationale. In time, the process of fact-checking your fears becomes habitual and you become less swayed by anxiety.

8. PRIORITIZE OUTCOMES

Since understanding how to be the best version of yourself requires looking inward for wisdom, you won’t find yourself by gathering tons of information. Let your ideal self set a goal. Pick something plain and achievable, like getting organized or reading more fiction. Making a measurable goal is one of the most effective ways to get out of your head and build confidence.

10. CREATE EMPOWERING RITUALS

No one would argue that the world’s most successful athletes, entrepreneurs and leaders have become the best versions of themselves. There’s one thing they all have in common: They’ve developed habits that make them great . This could mean meditation, priming or goal visualization to put them in an empowered state of being. It always includes eating healthy and exercising. And more often than not, it includes practicing gratitude every day.

11. HAVE COMPASSION FOR YOURSELF

Being the best version of yourself is about you – not other people. Stop comparing yourself to others and recognize that everyone is on a different path. If you’re not where you’d like to be, have compassion for yourself. You’re at a crossroads, and that’s fine. Instead of scrolling through social media or getting down about a recent setback, practice self-love . Get outside and go for a walk. Do something you enjoy. Always remember to check negative self-talk and replace it with empowering words.

12. MANAGE YOURSELF EFFECTIVELY

Part of understanding how to be the best version of yourself is learning to be your own boss through effective self-management. Effective time management sets you free from stress, steers you toward your ideal self and relieves you of others’ expectations. To stay accountable and in control of your resources, check in on your progress monthly, quarterly and yearly. Becoming your own best boss makes you a better resource for your team. 

13. STAY POSITIVE

As you learn how to be the best version of yourself, you’re sure to hit roadblocks and obstacles. Instead of getting discouraged, cultivate “positive” emotions like passion, curiosity and flexibility. Look at obstacles as opportunities instead of defeats. By staying positive, you’ll find creative solutions you’d miss if you had remained bogged down in self-defeating thoughts.

14. GIVE BACK

Contribution is one of our Six Human Needs and an essential element of what makes us feel fulfilled. When we give back to our communities , we feel a greater sense of gratitude and abundance in our own lives. Volunteering – whether by giving your time, skills, knowledge or money – is one way in which you can be the best version of you no matter who you are.

Become the best version of yourself

Reach your highest potential today by attending Unleash the Power Within.

10 Life-Changing Steps to Become the Best Version of Yourself

Do you want to become the best version of yourself? The road to greatness is not for the faint of heart. Here are 10 steps you need to become the best!

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Do you know how to become the best version of yourself?

In 1885, a monk set out to run a 1,000 day marathon. Specifically he and his fellow monks ran 40 kilometers a day for 100 days. Yes, you read that right. 40 kilometers per day! They did this for 5 years. They are called the Gyoja, or marathon monks. And these monks do the impossible.

• For the first 5 years they run 100 days, 40 kilometers each day
• The 6th year, they run 100 days, 60 kilometers each day
• The 7th year, they run 84 kilometers per day for 100 days and then do another 100 days where they run 40 kilometers each day.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention. During the 5 th year of the 1,000 day marathon, they have to go 7.5 days without food, water or rest.

From 1885 to 1988 only 46 men have completed the 1,000 day marathon.

These monks dare to do the impossible. They know how to be the best versions of themselves. They dare to push themselves to the extreme. They dare to be the best.

Do You Want to Become the Best You?

I hope you answered yes. In fact, if you didn’t answer with a resounding yes and a mental fist pump…

Then maybe you need more confidence….and I am happy to help.

Here’s a BIG truth: People who are the best have the confidence to want to become the best in the first place. So if you don’t have that confidence, maybe you’ve been told a lie that we’ve been told over and over again.

Here’s the lie: hard work is all it takes to become the best.

We’ve been sold the lie countless times through movies, books, and even by our parents. We’ve been told to put our heads down, to focus on our work. And then, after years of toiling, the magic starts to happen. Only after hard work can we feel good about ourselves. But here’s the big problem:

Hard work doesn’t always pay off.

When we work hard at something, all that happens is we get good at doing that thing . So if you’re counting pennies as a cashier at Walmart, you’ll be good at… counting pennies. And hey, you might even become the best at it.

But is it the best version of yourself?

Here’s the dilemma: If people don’t LOVE what they are doing, they will become the best at what they HATE.

This was me. In college I studied foreign languages because I was told I was good at them. I didn’t really have a passion for language but I was adept at learning them quickly. Then, 4 years into school I realized I hated every single one of my classes. I wished to take more psychology, sociology, and writing classes. 

If you don’t love what you are doing and are satisfied with living a life of mediocrity, then here’s my advice to you:

Stop reading this post. Go watch Netflix or skim Facebook. This post is for those of you who know you have a greater calling.

But if you are unsatisfied and want to become better… there’s hope. I know there’s hope because I’m living proof of it.

It wasn’t so long ago that I was voted most awkward in my graduating class.

• Nobody thought I would write a book on how to captivate everyone you meet .
• Nobody thought I would have the courage to give my own TED talk .
• Nobody thought I would host my own people skills course called People School .

But here I am today, having done all of that. I proved them wrong because I took the first steps to being my best.

In the book, Elite Minds , Dr. Stan Beecham dives into how great minds think differently. 

This is the Big Idea:

When you truly study top performers in any field, what sets them apart is not their physical skill; it is how they control their minds. — Stan Beecham

Here’s a simple equation to become your best:

The Best Version of You = Purpose x Courage x Control x Luck x Hard Work

To become your absolute best, you must gain control of each of these variables (we’ll talk about them below). But first…

WARNING: If at any time while reading this post, you say to yourself the following:

“I’ve heard this before.”

“This won’t work for me.”

Then it’s time to go back to square one. Are you sure you really want to be the best? Experts hear these thoughts and flip them off. They reframe with these mental challenges:

• I’ve heard this before. Why didn’t I listen the first time? If I’m hearing it again, it must be important.
• I’m going to find a way to make this work for me.

And if you’re struggling with reframing, you might want to start at the goals you’re setting for yourself. Setting the right goals can give you confidence and help you feel achievement:

How To Set Better Goals Using Science

Do you set the same goals over and over again? If you’re not achieving your goals – it’s not your fault! Let me show you the science-based goal-setting framework to help you achieve your biggest goals.

Here are 10 steps to teach you how to be the best:

Step #1: Know Your Purpose

Have you ever watched the documentary Jiro Dreams of Sushi? In this film, an 85-year old named Jiro Ono is considered by many to be the world’s greatest sushi chef. 

Check out a clip here, where you can see the perfect craftsmanship of Jiro himself:

The sushi that Mr. Ono creates is so good that famous people from all over the world fly in to enjoy their $300 sushi dinner—often booked several months in advance. 

Barack Obama even stated , “I was born in Hawaii and ate a lot of sushi, but this was the best sushi I’ve ever had in my life.”

So how did Jiro become the best sushi chef? He had one simple mission: to pursue his lifelong quest to create the perfect piece of sushi. For Jiro, it was as simple as that. He didn’t aspire to have a chain of restaurants or create the largest sushi mall in the world. Just one perfect piece of sushi.

So here’s the simple secret of all experts in their field:

To become the best version of yourself, you have to know your purpose.

Let’s dive into how you can begin to find your purpose. Think of what you are putting most of your effort into right now . For most people, that thing is their job. In fact, we spend an average of over 13 years of our life working. So, say after… 5, 10, 15 years of doing your job over and over again, you finally become the BEST at what you’re doing.

Ask yourself: would you be satisfied? Is that the absolute best version of yourself?

Now, I’m not saying you need to quit your job to become a painter or astronaut. No, sometimes our job is not our purpose. Sometimes we just need to put bread on the table.

But what I am saying is that instead of hard work, sometimes we need to step outside the box.

Think: what do you want to become the best at? Being the best doesn’t have to be about fame or power.

Be the best parent.

Be the best employee.

Be the best leader .

Be the best lover.

Don’t just be.

Be the best.

The Best Version of Yourself Exercise:

Think about your goal. What is it that you truly want to be the best at? Write it down: ________________________

If you’re having trouble thinking of what you’re good at, there’s a nifty exercise that you might find helpful —that can be taken in just a few minutes—in my article on how to find your calling . 

Or, you can watch my video below!

Step #2: Embrace Fear of Failure

The next step is to realize you might not make it . Yup, really.

Fear of failure is common for those who want to be the best version of themselves. And that’s a good thing. Asking…

• “ What if I can’t make it?”
• “What if I waste my time?”
• “What if I fail?”

Studies even suggest that roughly 75% of entrepreneurial ventures fail within 10 years. So does that mean you should just give up? Quite the opposite, really. The people at the top are the ones that take fear and learn to live with that fear.

Fear of failure is a mental and emotional awareness that success may not be possible. Too much fear of failure can hinder success and accomplishment, while too little fear of failure may not motivate you enough.

In fact, being a little fearful can actually make you achieve your goals more . That’s why Dr. Beecham suggests that we should have dreams that we think have only a 60% chance of success—not 100%. 

That other 40%? The 40% that says, “If I fail, then everything I ever worked for will be for nothing?” That fear is the exact thing you need to really get you going.

Here’s the thing: fear gets your full attention. When you are running from a pack of wild dogs, you will be 100% present in the moment . 

Fear gives you the motivation to achieve your goals.

And goals that are not frightening are not worth having. Think about your goals and dreams. Are they big enough? What are the chances you will achieve them? Do you have the emotional intelligence required to embrace fear and move forward?

• Do your goals make you a little afraid?
• If you are 100% sure you can achieve them, then they are too easy. Aim for 60/40!

If you need to, you can dive into some scientific ways to learn how to set goals , and set them so that the chance of you succeeding is only 60%.

And have you ever heard the phrase “fear is the killer of success”? True, too much fear can stop you from succeeding. But they forgot to mention one important thing:

Fear is the killer of success… but mind wandering is the killer of dreams.

Step #3: Control Your Mind

Now I spend a couple hours a week tending to my garden. In fact, I just planted pomegranate, fig, and mandarin orange trees with my husband!

But some people may dread having to get dirty and plant seeds—not to mention all the watering, mulching, and composting it takes. But to me, gardening is a time where I am relaxed and focused 100%.

And that’s great, considering a study of 2,250 people found that we are mentally checked-out almost half of our conscious time. According to the study by Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness , 46.9% of the time we are not focused on the outside world or what we are doing. 

Instead, we are spending our time looking into our own thoughts. This phenomenon is known as mind wandering.

Mind wandering is why some people’s “counting pennies” can be hell on earth, while for others this can be the next best thing to sliced cheese. When we mind wander, we aimlessly pursue our goals and fail to question exactly how far we are going or what is stopping us from becoming our best selves.

And here’s the most surprising part about mind wandering: people are not happy when they are mind wandering.

That means that for almost half the time you are conscious , you are also unhappy. Think about that for a moment.

When we mind wander, we live our life on autopilot and set our goals based on what others have already achieved. We think:

• “Bob at the office only had $5,000 in sales, so I can’t possibly do any better.”
• Or, “This invention has never been done before, so it’s probably not even possible.”

Ask yourself: what have you been told is not possible about your dreams? And more importantly…

What have you accepted as something you cannot accomplish?

Think about it this way: have you ever heard the story of the elephant and the rope?

Here’s the gist of the story:

• There was a man who was passing by some elephants. Suddenly, he stopped.
• He saw that there were elephants that were tied to trees. But the man saw these giant creatures were only tied by a simple small rope.
• He asked the elephant owner why they are tied there.
• The elephant owner responded, “When the elephants are very young, they are tied using a small rope. And it is enough to hold them there. But when they get older, they become conditioned to believe they cannot break free. So they never do.”

If you accept your circumstances as they are, you are the elephant tied to the rope. More than anything else, learning your accepted beliefs is a great opportunity to “reinvent” yourself (we’ll talk about how to change your beliefs in the next step).

Beecham even says that being conscious is one of the most important differentiators between top performers and stragglers:

“Elite competitors make it their business to understand and manage their unconscious mind by mastering the conscious thoughts and behavior.” — Beecham

• What beliefs have you been mind wandering about?
• Who has told you that you can’t achieve your goals? Do you believe them?
• What mental limitations do you feel you have? Are they really true?

Step #4: Harness Your Systems

On May 1 st , 2010 an athlete named Galen Rupp announced he was poised to break the American Record for fastest man during the 10,000 meter race.

Not only did he break the record that night… but his competitor, Chris Solinsky, also broke the record. If that wasn’t enough, a man named Simon Bairu broke yet another record that night—the Canadian record!

So why did all of these men break records and set their personal bests… all on one night ? 

Because the moment Galen Rupp announced he could break the record… breaking the record finally became a possibility.

More specifically, these record-breakers were forced to use the part of their brain that snapped them out of mind wandering . Professor Daniel Kahneman, author of Thinking, Fast and Slow , calls this part of our brain “System 2.”

System 2 is a way of thinking that is slow, deliberate, and thoughtful. It is used when making tough decisions or thinking “out of the box.” It is opposite from System 1, which is dictated by automatic and fast ways of thinking.

When we use the System 2 part of our brain, we instantly become more creative and challenge old ways of thinking.

• Use it to turn a fun little hobby into a career.
• Use it to turn your business idea into a reality.
• Use it to dream bigger dreams.

Using System 2 is that powerful . And the simple part is you can use it anywhere you want. 

“But how do I use System 2?”

System 2 requires one thing and one thing only… undivided attention. Yes, it’s that simple . But here’s the thing: most people don’t give their dreams and goals their undivided attention.

They are too busy snacking on Cheetos and playing Xbox while planning up their dreams.

So what’s possible for you? How fast do you think you can run? How high can you jump? How far can you take your dreams? Give your 100% undivided attention to this answer, and don’t let false beliefs cloud your judgment of what you can accomplish.

Because the answer to this question will define the boundaries of your success. 

Remember: the more you think is possible… the more that becomes possible.

• Take your previous goal(s). If you had to make it bigger, how would it change? _________________
• Now make it even bigger . 10 times bigger. 100 times. Is that possible? How does it make you feel? __________________

So how do we harness the power of System 2 to make our goals a reality? Well, it might start with a little bit of luck…

Step #5: Expect Luck

Now it’s time to question your unconscious expectations. Top performers believe they are lucky—they believe in the power of possibilities. And this belief radically changes their success.

Why? Their expectation of luck changes their behavior and how they see opportunities. In a study by UCLA and Columbia University , researchers found that our beliefs about luck fall into one of two categories: stable or fleeting.

• People who believe in a stable form of luck believe that we are either lucky or unlucky.
• People who believe in a fleeting type of luck believe that luck comes and goes, and is often unpredictable.

So why does this matter?

It turns out that the people with a stable form of luck had a significantly higher drive to succeed than the people who saw luck as fleeting.

Believing in luck makes you succeed.

That’s because the stable luck believers felt that luck was in their control , and used that belief to their advantage. The people who saw luck as simply fleeting didn’t care about luck—why believe in it if it’s a random occurrence? 

So, I can assure you—if you believe you are lucky, good things will happen. 

• Do you think you are lucky? What kind of luck do you have?
• Think of all the reasons you ARE lucky. List them out and post them somewhere you can see them and be reminded of your luck.

Okay, you might be wondering… “ Am I doomed to failure if I don’t believe in luck?”

You see, you WOULD be… if luck was the only thing that influences your performance ( hint: it’s not ). Along with luck, there’s an even more important factor…

Step #6: Assimilate Your Expectations

Here’s a story you will probably be able to relate to… and which also happens to be one of my favorite stories in Beecham’s entire book:

• Beecham’s daughter was about to run a track race with her school team.
• The morning of the race, Beecham handed his daughter some new athletic socks and told her, “Try these new socks. I bet you run at least a minute faster than you normally do if you wear the socks, and your legs will feel lighter and fresher.”

When Beecham said that, he officially primed his daughter to win. And the result of the race?

She went on to run the fastest race of her life. 

When her expectations were primed, she broke a 19-minute barrier in a 5K cross country event for the first time ever.

So whether you believe this was luck or not, science says it doesn’t really matter . What really matters is your expectation about the outcome.

It isn’t luck that determines your success—it’s expectation. — Dr. Beecham

In fact, there is a name for this type of expectation phenomenon. It’s called the Pygmalion effect .

The Pygmalion effect, or Rosenthal effect, is a phenomenon in which other people’s expectations about someone changes their behavior and performance.

Let’s take a look back into the past, at the first-ever study that looked specifically at expectations. In the 1960s, a Harvard psychologist named Robert Rosenthal conducted a study to determine whether teacher expectations would influence a student’s performance in the classroom:

• Rosenthal told teachers that certain students in the classroom were expected to be high achievers based on a specialized Harvard test that they took.
• The catch? These high achieving students were chosen completely at random, and were not smarter / more special / more talented than other students.

Here’s the amazing result… These “high achieving” students actually had much better academic performance than their peers! All because of expectations.

Expectations cannot be avoided, they can only be changed.

So if you’re wondering, “How do I become a better version of myself?”

Well, you don’t have to believe in luck… Rather, try believing in expectations.

As Beecham’s daughter and Rosenthal’s study showed, great expectations about us can really push us to succeed—especially if the other person is an influential figure in our life.

Now it’s your turn…

• What positive expectations do others have on you? From whom do they come from? Which ones are holding you back from becoming the best version of yourself?
• What do you expect from yourself? How can you make your expectations align with your goals?

Bonus: A lot of our expectations come from our friends. Learn how to make great friends as an adult and avoid toxic ones to change others’ expectations about you.

#7: Avoid Mental Handicapping

While positive expectations can increase our success, negative expectations can harm it. This is called a nocebo.

A nocebo is a believed negative effect from an expectation about us. The expectation can come from ourselves or from others around us. Nocebo is a term coined in 1961 by Walter Kennedy, which in Latin means “I will harm.” 

Harvard published an article on various medical experiments that showed exactly how powerful the nocebo is:

• Volunteers were told that an electrical current would pass through their heads and may cause a headache. Two-thirds of the volunteers developed a headache , despite no actual electrical current being passed.
• Volunteers who had allergies were given an injection and told it contained a food they were allergic to.The injection was only salt water, but it produced allergic symptoms in many of them.
• Patients with asthma were given a bronchodilator (which helps with asthma symptoms) but were told it was a bronchoconstrictor instead (which makes symptoms worse). The nocebo suggestion reduced the drug’s effectiveness by nearly 50%.

And it’s not just in the medical field that makes nocebos so harmful. We are exposed to nocebos everyday—how many times do people tell us we just can’t do things , and we believe them? 

Here’s the key takeaway: if you believe something will have a negative effect, it probably will. Having an elite mind isn’t just about raising your expectations. It’s also about eliminating the harmful ones. 

Take a moment to try to identify your nocebos:

• Do you see your failures and mistakes as one-time events or patterns?
• What is your greatest weakness? Is it permanent?
• What’s holding you back? What are you doing about it?

Remember: Increased self-awareness leads to improved performance. While your competitors are avoiding them and pretending they don’t exist, be exceptional… seek out difficult emotional beliefs and put an end to them for your own sake.

Step #8: Hustle, Don’t Excuse

What kind of person are you? Here’s a scenario:

• You have an important meeting to present today.
• You work on your presentation all night, but you are not 100% done yet.
• You decide to sleep early, and wing the rest of the presentation.
• The presentation flops.

What excuse do you make? Do you choose to:

• Ask yourself, “How could I make this better in the future?” or…
• Say to yourself, “It’s not my fault. There’s nothing I could do about it.”

If you chose the second option, science has some bad news for you.

In a study published in the Journal of Psychology , researchers found that 72% of college students admitted to making fraudulent excuses. That’s not very surprising.

But, what is surprising is that they found a direct correlation between fraudulent excuses and lower grade point average!

In other words…

If you make excuses, your success will suffer. 

Read that again and let it sink in.

What excuses are you making for your failures?

• If you aren’t attractive , do you tell yourself it’s just genetics? Or do you work hard to dress better, eat healthier, and go to the gym?
• If you aren’t charismatic , do you tell yourself you aren’t leadership material? Or do you work on your public speaking skills and learn how to be funnier ?
• If you don’t have a job you love , do you accept this as reality? Or do you spruce up your LinkedIn and get good at video calls to find the perfect job?

The Gyoja monks achieve the seemingly impossible because they get rid of excuses and double down:

• They commit.
• They have a clear goal.

Great achievers hustle and don’t tolerate excuses. In the words of Abraham Lincoln:

“Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.”  — Abraham Lincoln

Step #9: Be Great, Not Perfect

Every top performer in the history of anything has had a bad day. 

• SpaceX failed a rocket’s pre-launch test in 2016, resulting in a massive explosion and what Elon Musk described as “the most difficult and complex failure we have ever had in 14 years.”
• Famous bodybuilder, Dorian Yates, trained all year long for a competition, only to suffer a major triceps injury that could have put him in early retirement.
• Vincent Van Gogh constantly struggled with poverty and only sold one painting during his lifetime.

Here’s the deal: top performers don’t do things perfectly. They do things purposefully.

Perfect is just an excuse in a glittery costume. We can strive to obtain it, but it’s just silly to try to achieve it. And it’s no surprise that there are a ton of studies that point to perfectionism being correlated with mental health problems.

Remember, no matter who you are or how successful you have become…

You will have bad days, you will make mistakes, and you will have hurdles. 

So what do you focus on instead of perfection? Beecham found that elite minds shift the focus from perfect to learning.

Even if you feel like your life today is so far away from who you want to become, the important part to remember is to ask yourself this question every single day :

Was that the best I could do?

Don’t strive for perfection, but strive to do the best you can. And then do more. Even if you strive to do 1% better every day, you will be 100% better in just over 3 months.

Think about it this way: if you look at where you are now and where you want to be, it can look like it’s unobtainable.

It’s only when you take things one step at a time that progress actually starts to happen—slowly, but surely. Nothing is perfect, but adopt this one-day-at-a-time mentality, and I can guarantee you will see success.

• Make a list of your failures, and here’s the important part: save them. I save mine in what I call my “Failure File.”
• Review your failures. Learn from them.
• Honor your failures, because they make you who you are.

Oh, and those bad days we talked about earlier?

• SpaceX successfully landed 28 times after that incident. Now it’s primed to be the leading company to launch humans to Mars .
• Dorian Yates went on to win the Mr. Olympia title 3 weeks later.
• Now Vincent Van Gogh is a household name. And his most expensive painting, Portrait of Dr. Gachet, sold for $148.6 million. If only he were alive to see his success!

Step #10: Reframe Your Competition

You know as well as I do, competition makes people achieve more.

Competitors can help you. They can fuel you. And they can inspire you.

Take, for example, competitive racing. Have you ever wondered what’s the best starting lane for runners on a track? Is it the 1st lane, where you start at the very end and can see all the other runners? Or is it the 8th lane, where you start at the very beginning and see nobody?

While it depends on the athlete, it’s a general consensus that nobody wants to be in the 8th lane. Why is that?

Because as the leader of the race, you are literally competing for yourself.

When there is no competition, the only person to compare yourself with is you.

One of the best lanes to race on is the middle lane, or what is known as the marquee position . In this lane, a runner can see his opponents and chase them down throughout the race.

In other words, a great competitor raises your expectations, shatters your idea of what is possible, and sets the bar higher.

Being a top performer means that you use your competitors to help you run faster, not to hinder you.

• Think of all the competitors you have. Reframe your competitors so that you see them as “competitive markers.” The person in front of you is simply showing you what is possible. They are saying, “You can do this, or even become better!”

And remember… your competitors are afraid, too. No one is better or faster than you—only less afraid.

Final Point:

“If you plan on being anything less than you’re capable of being, you will probably be unhappy all the days of your life.” — Abraham Maslow

It is my mission in life and here at Science of People to help you achieve your goals faster. Here are some other resources to help you learn how to be the best version of yourself:

• 16 Science-Backed Leadership Strategies
• The Keys to Success
• 8 Ways to Achieve Greatness

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26 thoughts on “10 life-changing steps to become the best version of yourself”.

Nice post. Great quotes and reminders.

Thank you for reading, Kori!

Danielle | Science of People Team

Love this!. What a great posty. In addition there are only two kinds of people around you, one who will try to pull you down and one who would continue to lift you up. Eitherway, I would choose to be with those who would lift me up so I would not plateau in my own personal growth. Cause by growing yourself purposefully you will have the ability to grow others in the same way.

This is such a great point! We can choose to surround ourselves with positive, encouraging people. Thank you so much for reading and welcome to our community!

You’re really cool Danielle, I’m not sure yet but you seem to be very interesting. Thanks! Pleasure to be here. Will be reading more from the Science of People!

I really needed this in my life. I’m Chasing a music career. I want my music to be heard by millions and my name to known. Overall I would like my work appreciated and loved likewise “me” to loved by fans. Chasing a dream or career without initially support can be a bad start. I have just been trying to learn how to change my mentality so I can be this free true best version of my self that would gravitate people towards my art and being. How to do it without judging my own self or thinking peopleWill say I’m Doing too much. It’s really weird I really needed this. I am going to do my best to apply it. It’s what u said, be better every day. Did I give today my best, Can I give tomorrow my best and onward. Things I can do to get closer. Believing luck is not Random and that I am Lucky and will always be lucky / unlucky sometimes . I have to read Your article again tomorrow. I learned so much and how many questions still. How do I stop judging my self in my head and be true in showing my self. I know people could love but I guess deep down I’m Afraid of how I would look in their eyes, it’s crazy I’m Confused. How do I really teach my mind to believe it’s right without shame ? So many questions I really wish I can be lucky enough to even speak to you one on one to get this life changing answers. I’m afraid that if I don’t become the true me or the extreme or best version of me I might never achieve my dream Of truly being a superstar

So so inspiring!!! Thank You for the great work you do Vanessa! Hope to be a part of it someday soon!

Hi Via! Vanessa and I both thank you for your kind words. Yay for inspiration!

Beautiful reading this. Thank you. Those monks are my heroes!! yay

Thank you for reading, Heidi! And yes, those monks inspire me daily 🙂

Great article on daring to be great!! I love the quote from Batman Begins “Why do we fall Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves back up.” We must also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.

Awesome article!! This should be required readings for schools and I believe our education system should teach how to learn and how to achieve greatness in our lives instead of what to learn/memorize.

Great article. I had to laugh when I realized that I was exactly thinking like “If no one else has done, how could I” when it comes to take time for myself. If no one else is working half time in a meaningful job, how could I possibly find a meaningful job accepting a halftime employee.

What an AMAZING article! I LOVED it! So many epic quotes to choose from is hard to count. I think I’ll pick: “great achievers hustle and don’t tolerate excuses.” Bottom line: suck it up, get out there, and work as hard as you can, or someone else WILL cross the finish line before you.

What if a series of failures has ruined your “self efficacy”?

SUCH A GREAT ARTICLE! I had to make notes in order to read over again and again until I create stronger mental habits. Thank you so much and congratulations! You have no idea how much you impact on our daily life!

A great sharing in my opinion. Point 8 about not giving excuses but, instead, just keep working to improve the condition really resonates. Point 9 about keep working even after you have setbacks is also important.

The most essential thing to succeed, in my opinion, is to work hard with a purpose. You need to define your goals clearly and worked hard consistently until you achieved them. That is the basic principle of success and that is what you need to succeed.

Thank you Vanessa, for your insightful, life-enhancing article. Your best yet. Now’s the time to stop procrastinating and get weaving (as my late, RAF fighter pilot Dad used to say to me when I was a kid.)

I have to say…

This is such an inspiring piece! I’ve put a reminder in my to do app to come back to this every Saturday until I master it.

And thanks for introducing the book Elite Mind too. That will be a wonderful companion for your piece.

Wowza! Thank you for the insightful guidance on reframing self-talk and evaluating performance as progress toward improvement instead of perfection. Memorable quotes and examples!

wow Vanessa! reading this has been a mind blowing experience, i’m speechless….. thank you for this!

Probably the best article I have read so far on How to become the best version of yourself

Insightful. Practical. Action-Oriented.

Your last point on being the best version of yourself is totally indepth true and i will make sure i’ll be successfull one day Thank you! Good content

Awesome article, thank you Team!

Thank you so much for sharing this life changing article. I am truly blessed! 😊

Comments are closed.

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How to Be the Best Version of Yourself at Work

• Rakshitha Arni Ravishankar

Nine ways to bring your A-game.

Committing to self-improvement is an important part of bringing your best self to work.

• Welcome negative feedback without being reactive. Assess your weaknesses, and then take steps to change career-limiting behaviors.
• Set realistic goals for yourself by figuring out what you want to accomplish, prioritizing effectively, motivating yourself, and tracking your progress.
• Always look for opportunities to learn by reading, listening, watching, or asking questions that will help you grow.
• Focus on your physical and mental health — get enough sleep, exercise, and try to avoid burnout. Learn to say “no” to additional work if you’re not actually able to take it on.
• Avoid multitasking, which can actually decrease your productivity, and find simple ways to limit distractions.

Do you sit back and wait for an annual performance review to think about your work performance? It does feel easier to wait for another person to tell you about how you can improve yourself. But how can you do a better job every day without waiting for an annual feedback? The trick here is to work on yourself, not the job. Your work reflects you, so begin by making yourself better, and success will follow.  Here are nine ways to help you get better at what you do and become the best version of yourself.

• RR Rakshitha Arni Ravishankar is an associate editor at Ascend.

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How to better yourself: 15 tips to improve yourself everyday

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What does it mean to improve yourself? Growth  

The important of bettering and improving yourself every day

15 ways to better yourself and improve your life, learn how to better yourself and improve your quality of life.

Do you feel stuck in a rut?

It can feel frustrating to be stuck in the same place and feel like nothing is changing. When you’re languishing , it feels like you’re not moving forward toward your goals.  One of the ways to break this rut is to take action. Making a conscious decision to better yourself can be empowering and motivating.

But self-improvement sometimes gets a bad rap, and for good reason. Our desire to improve ourselves has spawned an industry full of bad hacks that can leave you feeling more frustrated than before. Or, that feel good but don't move you forward.

Working to improve yourself can positively impact your own well-being and your relationships with family, friends, and colleagues. Let’s explore 15 things you can try that will move you forward — get involved in your own well-being and learn how to work on yourself .

What does it mean to improve yourself? Growth

For some people, the idea of improving yourself is motivating. For others, it can be more helpful to think about it as growth. Growth is positive and not always a straight line.

Improving yourself is a very personal journey, and the specifics can change from person to person. It requires putting in the work and being willing to experience discomfort.

Change is uncomfortable. Growth requires stretching past what you know. But every step you take is part of the process toward becoming the best version of yourself.

Behavior change can be a long process, but it doesn’t have to be grueling. In his talk, Atomic Habits , James Clear talks about the power of improving just 1% every day. Improving yourself can be a series of small habit changes, like taking five minutes in your day to be more mindful . Or it can be a more involved process, like overcoming fears .

However, bettering yourself doesn’t mean changing the core of who you are. For example, if you’re an introvert, you shouldn’t aim to become an extrovert. 

On the other hand, if you have social anxiety, you can practice learning techniques to get past your discomfort. Eventually you may fully conquer your social anxiety so that you can navigate social settings with more ease.

There are several reasons to keep improving yourself every day.

Every time you improve in one aspect of your life, you can feel more fulfilled as you start achieving your goals . And bettering yourself can help you in every aspect of life.

For instance, bettering yourself at work can help you improve your work performance , find more meaning in your work , and even get promoted .

Bettering yourself can also help you improve your personal relationships, improve your ability to set boundaries , and form closer bonds with the ones you love. Acting to improve yourself is a form of self-care , and if you look after yourself better, you’re more likely to have more to give to others.

Plus, you can develop improvement goals alongside your loved ones. Having their support improves your chances of success, and working together to achieve similar goals can help you bring you closer.

Finally, learning how to improve yourself is a valuable capability to have in a world where you must constantly adapt. Knowing that you have the capacity for change can make you more confident about the future and less afraid of discomfort.

You've been there before. You already have a history of successfully growing and improving yourself — you can do it again.

Want to learn how to improve yourself and feel better? Here are 15 tips you can implement in your life right away to become your best self.

1. Make time for rest

Before you learn how to be better, it’s important to start with the basics. You need to have your basic needs met before you move on to self-improvement. Part of that is to make time for rest and self-care.

There are many different types of rest . Are there moments in your schedule where you have the opportunity to do nothing and take a break? Those quiet moments of rest can help you decompress and process what happened in your day.

That’s why making time for rest can do wonders for your well-being. Plus, when you’re well-rested, you’ll have more bandwidth to work on the other ways you can better yourself.

2. Read more books

There are books on virtually everything. So, reading more books can help you explore your current interests, but also develop new ones. You can even learn a new skill with a book.

Some books are written specifically to help you start working on self-improvement  and personal growth . You can also read to improve your leadership skills .

But even getting deeply engrossed in a fiction novel can do wonders for you. The bottom line is that whatever passions you may have (or be curious about), carve out some time to read about them.

3. Start a gratitude practice

One way to learn how to be a better person is by being grateful for what you have.

Practicing gratitude for your current situation  can help you avoid feeling bitter about what you don’t have.

You don’t have to feel grateful about huge things, either. Try to notice the small things that make you happy and make you feel grateful.

You can fine-tune your gratitude practice over time . With practice, it gets easier to naturally think of what you’re grateful for. This new perception can change your life for the better.

4. Learn a new language

It’s never too late to learn a new language. Learning how to speak another language helps you think differently and see things around you in a new light. It can also open up doors for you.

You’ll get to immerse yourself in another culture as you learn how another language operates differently from English. Plus, you can travel to places where people speak the language you’re learning.

Learning a second language can do more than help you out during your travels abroad. It can even help you with your career opportunities.

More and more employers in the US are looking for bilingual talent. Currently, surveys show that US employers are struggling to find enough employees who speak languages other than English .

56% of employers report that their needs for foreign languages in the workplace have increased over the past five years. And 1/3 of employers currently don’t meet those needs with their current workforce.

Some of the languages that are high in demand include Spanish, Chinese, and French.

5. Try meditation

Meditation provides you with a great way to slow down in a fast-paced world. Even just a few minutes a day of meditation can help you better yourself and improve your mental health.

A recent study has shown that meditation can improve anxiety, depression, and pain scores , especially during times of crisis.

You’ll also become more aware of your thought patterns. This mindfulness means you can learn more about yourself over time. It can help you spot bad habits  that are making a negative impact on your mood and your life.

Meditation can also help you practice mindful breathing  and improve your self-awareness.

6. Write in a journal

Journaling is a great way to complement your meditation and gratitude practices. It also makes a great new hobby.

You can write about the things you’re grateful for in your journal. You can also practice how to become more aware of your own thoughts.

Plus, research shows that journaling can improve your well-being and reduce mental distress . The same research shows that participants had increased their resilience  after the first two months of continuous journaling.

When you start writing in your journal , do your best not to censor yourself. Write what comes to mind, and don’t judge what comes out.

7. Nourish yourself with healthy foods

It’s easier to live your best life when you feel energized and well-fueled. What you eat has a huge influence on how you feel .

Start watching what you put in your body. Eat a variety of different foods in different colors across all food groups.

Try to eat fresh foods whenever you can. If you don’t have time to cook healthy meals at home, look for other alternatives, like meal kit subscriptions or healthy catering services.

8. Add more movement to your life

While nutrition plays a huge part in how you feel, movement and exercise also have a role to play .

There’s a variety of ways to start moving more. For instance, you can start a new sport and even have a friend join you to spend quality time with them.

If you’re not interested in picking up a sport or joining a gym, you can still find other ways to add movement to your life. For example, you can start taking daily walks.

You can also start an exercise routine from the comfort of your own home. Many free workout routines are available online , which means there’s always something new for you to do if you get bored.

9. Practice kindness toward others

Kindness is one of the best ways to become a better you.

First, it’s free. It doesn’t require much effort to be kind instead of indifferent or unkind.

Second, it can help you feel much better about yourself.

Third, it can improve other people’s lives as well. Showing kindness requires you to become more aware of those around you. By doing so, you’ll notice more of what people need, even when they don’t say it.

For example, you may notice a work colleague is struggling with something you can help with. Or you may see a stranger struggling to open a door with a baby stroller.

Make it a goal to do one random act of kindness every day. If you’ve started journaling, note how it made you feel and how the other person reacted.

10. Spend more time outdoors

If you work in an office ( and even if you work remotely ), chances are you don’t get to spend a lot of time outside during the day.

Find opportunities in your schedule to spend more time outdoors. If you have access to areas of nature, consider spending time there.

A recent study shows that even a short 15-minute walk in the forest can decrease negative moods like anxiety, fatigue, anger, and depression . In the study, forest walks were more effective than city walks.

They were also more effective in participants who had higher anxiety levels.

With the right clothing, you can take advantage of the outdoors even when the weather isn’t perfect. Consider saving some money to invest in robust outdoor clothing that can protect you in any weather.

If you take up an outdoor activity, make sure you’re well equipped for it. For example, make sure you have good hiking shoes if you begin hiking.

11. Develop a list of goals

If you want to better yourself over time, it’s important to start setting goals .

When you write down specific goals, you can start tracking your progress over time. This is another thing you can journal about.

For example, you can set a goal to walk every day for 30 minutes by the end of the year. You can work up to your goal incrementally.

For instance, if you currently take no walks, you can start with short 10-minute walks three times a week. Every week, you can increase the length of your walks.

And every few weeks, you can add a new walk to your schedule until you reach your daily walking goal.

12. Work to improve your fear of failure

Fear of failure can stop you from taking steps forward to achieve your goals and working on your self-development.

To better yourself, it’s important to find ways to do the difficult things, even when fear is holding you back. That’s why it’s important to work on your fear of failure and ease out of your comfort zone.

To improve this fear, you can start with small things and work your way up to bigger fears. This means you don’t have to start by conquering your fear of public speaking  by signing up to give a seminar at work.

Instead, you can work up to that in small increments.

For example, practice public speaking in a private setting to people close to you whom you trust, like your family or spouse.

Over time, you can start practicing in front of more and more people. Every time you speak in front of someone new, you’ll prove to yourself that you can conquer your fear of failure.

Remember that failure will still happen, and that’s okay. Resist the urge to beat yourself up when you fail. Embrace the failure and see it as a necessary stepping stone toward reaching your goals.

13. Limit activities that drain you

Are you noticing that spending too much time scrolling through social media is sapping away at your good mood ?

Have you found that spending too much time around negative people chips away at your energy?

Try to notice what fulfills you and what drains you throughout the day. Some activities that drain you may be unavoidable, like updating your budget or grocery shopping.

But there are other factors that you have much more control over.

For example, try deleting social media apps on your phone  if you find yourself in a sour mood after too much scrolling. Or try to limit how much time you spend with people who are constantly negative around you.

14. Practice saying no to assert your boundaries

It can be easy to say yes to everyone and everything, even when you don’t feel comfortable. This can be true at work and in your personal life.

Some family members invite you to their home the day you set aside for you-time? You’re allowed to say no and keep that day to yourself.

Your manager asks you to take a look at something while you’re on vacation? You can also choose to say no.

15. Inner work®

Inner work happens when you explore your inner experiences.

It involves all of the processes, values, and mental models that you use to navigate the world. Some examples include decision-making , spiritual wellness , and self-awareness .

Inner work can be even more effective when you combine it with support from a coach and trusted inner circle who can help you reflect and take action. 

Bonus tip:  Work with a coach

One of the best ways to grow and improve is to get support. By working with a coach, you get someone who can help you see yourself more clearly and who is there to help you succeed. You deserve to have someone in your corner.

Coaches at BetterUp know how to help you unlock your personal and professional growth . They can also help you develop the practice of inner work so that you never stop growing.

A coach can give you a new perspective on self-improvement that you wouldn’t have on your own.

They can also help you with other specific aspects of improvement that can help you thrive in life, like improving your diet and increasing your resilience.

Self-improvement is unique for every person. It’s a highly personal process.

That’s why working one-on-one with a BetterUp coach can help you set specific goals that work for you. See how BetterUp can help you  on your journey to better yourself.

Explore growth with a personal coach

Unlock your potential and achieve your goals with guidance from our expert coaches.

Elizabeth Perry, ACC

Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships. With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.

How to walk the freeing path of believing in yourself

17 self-awareness activities for exploring yourself, self-care and work-life balance: how to take care of yourself, 13 imposter syndrome books from psychologists and coaches, what is determination develop traits you need to succeed, stop comparing yourself to others: do these 10 things instead, how to feel better about yourself and improve your self-esteem, are you reaching your full potential a guide to personal development, you’ve earned it: learn about the benefits of rewarding yourself, learn how to stay positive with these 15 tips, 15 questions to discover your life purpose and drive meaning, how to take care of yourself mentally and physically, it’s not you, it’s your well-being: coach tips for strengthening relationships, starting with yourself, 15 tips for your end-of-year reviews, how being intentional can improve your life, how to change your perspective and change your life, stay connected with betterup, get our newsletter, event invites, plus product insights and research..

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15 Tips for Writing a College Essay About Yourself

What’s covered:.

• What is the Purpose of the College Essay?
• How to Stand Out Without Showing Off
• 15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself
• Where to Get Free Feedback on Your Essay

Most students who apply to top-tier colleges have exceptional grades, standardized test scores, and extracurricular activities. How do admissions officers decide which applicants to choose among all these stellar students? One way is on the strength of their college essay .

This personal statement, along with other qualitative factors like teacher recommendations, helps the admissions committee see who you really are—the person behind the transcript. So, it’s obviously important to write a great one.

What Is the Purpose of the College Essay? 

Your college essay helps you stand out in a pool of qualified candidates. If effective, it will also show the admissions committee more of your personality and allow them to get a sense of how you’ll fit in with and contribute to the student body and institution. Additionally, it will show the school that you can express yourself persuasively and clearly in writing, which is an important part of most careers, no matter where you end up. 

Typically, students must submit a personal statement (usually the Common App essay ) along with school-specific supplements. Some students are surprised to learn that essays typically count for around 25% of your entire application at the top 250 schools. That’s an enormous chunk, especially considering that, unlike your transcript and extracurriculars, it isn’t an assessment of your entire high school career.  

The purpose of the college essay is to paint a complete picture of yourself, showing admissions committees the person behind the grades and test scores. A strong college essay shows your unique experiences, personality, perspective, interests, and values—ultimately, what makes you unique. After all, people attend college, not their grades or test scores. The college essay also provides students with a considerable amount of agency in their application, empowering them to share their own stories.

How to Stand Out Without Showing Off 

It’s important to strike a balance between exploring your achievements and demonstrating humility. Your aim should be to focus on the meaning behind the experience and how it changed your outlook, not the accomplishment itself. 

Confidence without cockiness is the key here. Don’t simply catalog your achievements, there are other areas on your application to share them. Rather, mention your achievements when they’re critical to the story you’re telling. It’s helpful to think of achievements as compliments, not highlights, of your college essay.  

Take this essay excerpt , for example:

My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go. 

Instead of saying “ I received this scholarship and participated in this prestigious program, ” the author tells a story, demonstrating their growth and initiative through specific actions (riding the train alone, applying academic programs on her own, etc.)—effectively showing rather than telling.

15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself 

1. start early .

Leave yourself plenty of time to write your college essay—it’s stressful enough to compose a compelling essay without putting yourself under a deadline. Starting early on your essay also leaves you time to edit and refine your work, have others read your work (for example, your parents or a teacher), and carefully proofread.

2. Choose a topic that’s meaningful to you 

The foundation of a great essay is selecting a topic that has real meaning for you. If you’re passionate about the subject, the reader will feel it. Alternatively, choosing a topic you think the admissions committee is looking for, but isn’t all that important to you, won’t make for a compelling essay; it will be obvious that you’re not very invested in it.

3. Show your personality 

One of the main points of your college essay is to convey your personality. Admissions officers will see your transcript and read about the awards you’ve won, but the essay will help them get to know you as a person. Make sure your personality is evident in each part—if you are a jokester, incorporate some humor. Your friends should be able to pick your essay from an anonymous pile, read it, and recognize it as yours. In that same vein, someone who doesn’t know you at all should feel like they understand your personality after reading your essay. 

4. Write in your own voice 

In order to bring authenticity to your essay, you’ll need to write in your own voice. Don’t be overly formal (but don’t be too casual, either). Remember: you want the reader to get to know the real you, not a version of you that comes across as overly stiff or stilted. You should feel free to use contractions, incorporate dialogue, and employ vocabulary that comes naturally to you. 

5. Use specific examples 

Real, concrete stories and examples will help your essay come to life. They’ll add color to your narrative and make it more compelling for the reader. The goal, after all, is to engage your audience—the admissions committee. 

For example, instead of stating that you care about animals, you should tell us a story about how you took care of an injured stray cat. 

Consider this side-by-side comparison:

Example 1: I care deeply about animals and even once rescued a stray cat. The cat had an injured leg, and I helped nurse it back to health.

Example 2: I lost many nights of sleep trying to nurse the stray cat back to health. Its leg infection was extremely painful, and it meowed in distress up until the wee hours of the morning. I didn’t mind it though; what mattered was that the cat regained its strength. So, I stayed awake to administer its medicine and soothe it with loving ear rubs.

The second example helps us visualize this situation and is more illustrative of the writer’s personality. Because she stayed awake to care for the cat, we can infer that she is a compassionate person who cares about animals. We don’t get the same depth with the first example. 

6. Don’t be afraid to show off… 

You should always put your best foot forward—the whole point of your essay is to market yourself to colleges. This isn’t the time to be shy about your accomplishments, skills, or qualities. 

7. …While also maintaining humility 

But don’t brag. Demonstrate humility when discussing your achievements. In the example above, for instance, the author discusses her accomplishments while noting that her parents thought of her as immature. This is a great way to show humility while still highlighting that she was able to prove her parents wrong.

8. Be vulnerable 

Vulnerability goes hand in hand with humility and authenticity. Don’t shy away from exploring how your experience affected you and the feelings you experienced. This, too, will help your story come to life. 

Here’s an excerpt from a Common App essay that demonstrates vulnerability and allows us to connect with the writer:  

“You ruined my life!” After months of quiet anger, my brother finally confronted me. To my shame, I had been appallingly ignorant of his pain. 

Despite being twins, Max and I are profoundly different. Having intellectual interests from a young age that, well, interested very few of my peers, I often felt out of step in comparison with my highly-social brother. Everything appeared to come effortlessly for Max and, while we share an extremely tight bond, his frequent time away with friends left me feeling more and more alone as we grew older.

In this essay, the writer isn’t afraid to share his insecurities and feelings with us. He states that he had been “ appallingly ignorant ” of his brother’s pain, that he “ often felt out of step ” compared to his brother, and that he had felt “ more and more alone ” over time. These are all emotions that you may not necessarily share with someone you just met, but it’s exactly this vulnerability that makes the essay more raw and relatable. 

9. Don’t lie or hyperbolize 

This essay is about the authentic you. Lying or hyperbolizing to make yourself sound better will not only make your essay—and entire application—less genuine, but it will also weaken it. More than likely, it will be obvious that you’re exaggerating. Plus, if colleges later find out that you haven’t been truthful in any part of your application, it’s grounds for revoking your acceptance or even expulsion if you’ve already matriculated. 

10. Avoid cliches 

How the COVID-19 pandemic changed your life. A sports victory as a metaphor for your journey. How a pet death altered your entire outlook. Admissions officers have seen more essays on these topics than they can possibly count. Unless you have a truly unique angle, then it’s in your best interest to avoid them. Learn which topics are cliche and how to fix them . 

11. Proofread 

This is a critical step. Even a small error can break your essay, however amazing it is otherwise. Make sure you read it over carefully, and get another set of eyes (or two or three other sets of eyes), just in case.

12. Abstain from using AI

There are a handful of good reasons to avoid using artificial intelligence (AI) to write your college essay. Most importantly, it’s dishonest and likely to be not very good; AI-generated essays are generally formulaic, generic, and boring—everything you’re trying to avoid being.   The purpose of the college essay is to share what makes you unique and highlight your personal experiences and perspectives, something that AI can’t capture.

13. Use parents as advisors, not editors

The voice of an adult is different from that of a high schooler and admissions committees are experts at spotting the writing of parents. Parents can play a valuable role in creating your college essay—advising, proofreading, and providing encouragement during those stressful moments. However, they should not write or edit your college essay with their words.

14. Have a hook

Admissions committees have a lot of essays to read and getting their attention is essential for standing out among a crowded field of applicants. A great hook captures your reader’s imagination and encourages them to keep reading your essay. Start strong, first impressions are everything!

15. Give them something to remember

The ending of your college essay is just as important as the beginning. Give your reader something to remember by composing an engaging and punchy paragraph or line—called a kicker in journalism—that ties everything you’ve written above together.

Where to Get Free Feedback on Your College Essay 

Before you send off your application, make sure you get feedback from a trusted source on your essay. CollegeVine’s free peer essay review will give you the support you need to ensure you’ve effectively presented your personality and accomplishments. Our expert essay review pairs you with an advisor to help you refine your writing, submit your best work, and boost your chances of getting into your dream school. Find the right advisor for you and get started on honing a winning essay.

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

How To Be the Best Version of Yourself

Ken Mazaika , CTO and co-founder of thefirehoseproject.org, answered the question, “What can I do to make sure I am becoming the best version of myself?” on Quora .

I identified 21 actions that could help you become the best version of yourself.

#19 is the most actionable of them all.

1. Just show up. Say you want to run a marathon, but have no prior experience. The first step is lacing up you shoes and hitting the pavement. Even if you only make it half a mile on your first training run, you’ll be about 2% closer to your ultimate goal than if you didn’t put in any work at all.

2. Start from the beginning. You don’t just happen to stumble upon the best version of yourself. You need to start from the beginning and take a high number of small steps in order to become what you envision.

3. Recognize that the best version of yourself should be your vision, not anybody else’s. Don’t waste energy trying to live up to what somebody else wants you to be.

Related from Quora: How can I be a superhuman in all areas?

4. Stop looking for a secret trick. There is no miraculous shortcut to the better version of yourself.

5. Use Twitter to network. It’s never been easier to get in touch with influential and powerful people. Earlier in my career, I reached out a high-level executive of a company I was interested in. He was hosting an AMA session on Twitter. I asked him for advice about how to get hired for his company, and not only did he reply with some helpful tips, he also connected me with specific people at the company about an open position.

6. Don’t sweat the details. Just make sure that you’re moving in the right general direction. You probably don’t have the knowledge you need today to know the shortest path to your happiness five years from today. But you probably have some idea about how to move in the right direction. Take those steps.

7. Recognize the opportunity at hand. The Internet has fundamentally changed everything. Previously, knowledge was locked away in the minds of industry experts and in the pages of books that you needed to buy or check out from a library. But now, it’s easier than ever to learn new skills. This is essential to becoming the best version of yourself.

8. Write on Medium . Translating your thoughts into written narratives pushes you to think about the ideas in your head at a much deeper level.

9. Don’t count the hours. They don’t matter. Think about the last time you ran on a treadmill. If you looked down at the timer every few seconds, you probably didn’t enjoy your run. In turn, this made it far more difficult to run far.

But what if you took the opposite approach? You plugged in your headphones, lost yourself in the music, and took it one stride at a time….while resisting any temptation to look at the timer at all. If you did this, you probably discovered that you enjoyed the run and made it pretty far. Counting hours just slows you down from reaching your goal.

10. Accept help from other people. Don’t let your pride get in the way. Most successful people needed help along the way, too.

Related from Quora : Which influential person, alive or dead, should I study (thoughts, dialogue, habits, ect.) scrupulously to become the best version of myself?

11. Launch a personal website. Maintaining an online presence of yourself pushes you to become the best possible version of you.

12. Write answers on Quora. Quora is an amazing place to help and inspire people at scale.

13. Ignore the social media scoreboard. People depict an extremely exaggerated version of life on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, and other social platforms. We only share the good things, not the bad. So when you compare yourself to what you see on social media, you’re just hurting yourself.

14. Celebrate the small wins. Appreciating what you’re doing in the present gives you the motivation to keep making strides towards your ultimate goal.

15. Stop pretending to know things you don’t know. You’ll never learn anything if you pretend to already know everything.

16. Embrace failure. You can’t become the best version of yourself by playing it safe. Heck, getting fired could even be the best thing that ever happened to you, just look at Noah Kagan (employee 30 at Facebook).

17. Call your family. This is just the decent thing to do. But you can also learn lessons from your family that aren’t available through any Google search and aren’t accessible to pretty much anyone else in the world.

18. Exercise in the morning. Once I started doing this in the morning, I became far more focused and relaxed throughout the day. Science backs that up, too.

Related from Quora: How do I make sure I’m not overthinking?

19. Create a side project. Doing something productive outside of work that makes you happy helps you become a better version of yourself. So, whatever it is…an app, film, album, whatever….start doing it on your nights and weekends. And who knows? It might just turn into a full-time job that you love.

20. Help other people become the best version of themselves. Pay it forward. Doing so keep you motivated on your own path, and you’ll find that the lasting connections you build from helping others will greatly benefit you moving forward.

21. Launch your MVP early. If you’re not satisfied with the current version of yourself, then the quickest way to solve the problem is to begin working towards the better version today. There is no “right time” to get started.

It can be tempting to think about the best version of yourself as some intangible point in the future. You know, the one where you are:

• More successful
• Doing what you love
• Existing as an overall happier person

You see your current self as the regular season, and you’re just waiting for the playoffs to start before giving it your all.

But if all you do is wait for the best version of yourself to happen, you’re forever going to be stuck with the current version.

So, how do you launch the best version of yourself? Start making progress today .

Sometimes, you need to make a big change in order to unleash the best version of yourself. If one thought recently entered your mind, then it’s time to do it.

This question originally appeared on Quora : What can I do to make sure I’m becoming the best version of myself?

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Become Your Most Excellent Self With These 25 Transformative Mind Shifts And Actions

Are you feeling “meh” about yourself lately?

Like most of us, you’re likely filled with potential that has yet to be tapped.

We all strive to be the best version of ourselves, but it can be challenging to figure out who that version is and how to access it. 

However, with the right mindset and tools, gaining more clarity about what you want and overcoming the roadblocks holding you back from getting it is possible.

The good news is that your self-evolution is a lifelong process, as you will define and redefine who your best self is many times throughout your life. 

So, get ready to embrace the journey and celebrate each step of growth along the way!

What Does Being the Best Version of Yourself Mean?

1. find joy in the present moment, 2. embrace excitement about the process, 3. shift your mindset, 4. change your view on failure, 5. get clear on your values, 6. create a vision for your new self, 7. draft your plan, 8. turn actions into rituals, 9. prioritize your relationships, 10. let go of distractions, 11. focus on the task at hand, 12. declutter your life, 13. put experiences ahead of things, 14. allow yourself time to recharge, 15. listen to your intuition, 16. stretch yourself, 17. release resentments and anger, 18. heal your wounds, 19. stay energized and fit, 20. nourish your body, 21. practice gratitude, 22. be of service to others, 23. stay humble and keep learning, 24. keep evolving, 25. refine regularly, final thoughts.

It’s an ambiguous statement that might sound like self-help fluff, but behind the fluffy words is a truckload of possibility.

When you strive to be authentic and live a life of meaning and fulfillment, you intentionally craft someone who is integrated, evolved, and self-aware. 

The process requires recognizing your strengths, weaknesses, values, and beliefs and using them to guide your actions and decisions.

Throughout the process, you continuously improve and grow in all areas of your life, including your relationships, career, spiritual life, emotions, and overall well-being.

Achieving this growth requires setting goals, stretching yourself, and overcoming the internal and external challenges that hold you back.

Of course being kind, compassionate, and empathetic towards yourself and others are necessary elements to being your best self.

Cultivating positive relationships and treating others with respect and understanding will make you feel happy and confident in yourself.

Ultimately, being the best version of yourself means living a life aligned with your values, purpose, and aspirations and positively impacting the world around you.

How to Become the Best Version of Yourself

How can you be happy right now if you feel like you aren’t your best self? Discontentment can lead to lethargy and even hopelessness, preventing you from taking positive action.

But you can reduce the tension between knowing that you should be content right now and the inner urging for something more. 

There is a way to balance your ongoing contentment and happiness. The best way to do this is by remaining engaged in the present moment , even as you begin the journey of change.

Begin to view the journey of personal evolution as a place for happiness and contentment. Rather than holding back joy while you await an outcome, enjoy the process. 

Every step along the path, every stage of life, and every small action should be savored and celebrated. Life is 99.9% process. Reaching outcomes are fleeting moments. If you can’t find joy in the journey, you’ll spend most of your life unhappy.

You will experience tedious, dull, or even painful moments during the process. Rather than resisting or struggling against these times, breathe into them. 

Shift your thinking so that you become aware of even the smallest value these moments add to your experience of life. As you infuse positive energy into these moments, they become less stressful or difficult.

Failure is part of the process. And even though failure stings, its venom serves your growth. Failure means you are engaged in life because you’ve taken a risk toward your vision.

Failure also gives you information to carry forward on your journey. You learn what works and what doesn’t and what you need to do differently. It builds tenacity and resilience.

If you haven’t defined the best version of yourself, begin with values. What are the most critical values in your life and work that can serve as guiding principles for your life?

What values will define the person you are now and want to be in the future?

As you narrow your most critical values, drill down to how you want those values to work in your day-to-day life. Look at how you aren’t honoring those values right now and what you can do to correct that.

Give yourself the gift of time and emotional space to create a vision for your life for the next few years. Use your most important values as a framework for this vision. 

Look at every aspect of your life and define how you want it to look. Write it down. And remember to enjoy the process of creating a vision. It is creative, life-affirming work.

When you have a vision for yourself, you need a plan for materializing this vision. You need action steps. Prioritize the elements of your vision and create a strategy for action. Break it down into small, manageable steps.

Begin with the parts of the vision that will positively impact your life right now or as soon as possible. It will energize you to continue on with the next piece of your vision.

A ritual is an action imbued with purpose and meaning. Each action step along the way to your vision is a microcosm of the outcome.

Rather than viewing each step as a boring task, turn it into a ritual — something beautiful that is a crystalline drop of your beautiful vision. 

Create a physical space and atmosphere that inspires and motivates you. Wear clothes that make you feel powerful and energized.

Repeat affirmations or begin your work with a meditation to foster the best mindset. 

Relationships are the most essential part of our lives. Nothing matters more. Define the best version of yourself in your relationships.

Who do you know yourself to be inside? How does this person want to interact with loved ones and others in your life? 

Find the beauty in letting this person emerge as you release anger, jealousies, frustrations, blame, and hurt. Enjoy the process of releasing the old you to welcome the real you.

Our time is limited. We can’t have everything, be everything, and do everything. We are scattered and unfocused if we stuff our lives with too much. 

Life is abundant, and it tempts us with so many options. Choose what is most important right now and gently release all else for another time or for good.

Scrolling on your phone, binge-watching Netflix, or posting on social media won’t help you become a better person.

Whatever you are doing, focus on it. Savor it. Roll around in it. Love it, even if it’s painful. There is beauty even in pain. 

Don’t struggle against it or wish for something more. If you are doing it now with intention, it is the most important thing in the world. Give it your full attention.

When you are focused, many other things in your life fall away naturally. Things you don’t really need. Begin to sweep some of these things out the door. 

Simplify your life, your thoughts, and your relationships. Give yourself the space and energy to focus and love the process you are working on.

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Experiences almost always trump money and possessions in long-term life satisfaction. Experiences stay in your memory and create residual happy feelings. 

As you define your new life, put your efforts and income more on experiences than material things. 

Give yourself a mental and physical recess, a time for play and creative introspection. Remove yourself from stresses and demands to clear your mind for new ideas, inspiration, and recharging. 

Being in nature supports this process. So does meditation, spending time with friends and family, and reading motivational books and articles.

Pay attention to intuition regardless of how analytical or brainy you may be. Intuition arises from an accumulation of all of our memories and experiences. It has something important to say to us, so listen up.

If an idea or path you’re pursuing doesn’t feel right, examine it more carefully. Or if you keep returning to an idea that, on the surface, seems silly or impossible, pay attention to it.

Your internal world may know something you don’t.

Stretch yourself. Go a step or two farther than you think you can. Push yourself a bit into the discomfort zone. Do this regularly, and you’ll be amazed at your capacity for greatness. Breathe into the stretch and enjoy it.

Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Whatever it is, put it in a red balloon and release it. Ah, freedom.

Holding on to grudges and resentment will drag you down and prevent you from growing and evolving. Let them go.

Where you are wounded, where you are hurt, where you are frightened — seek healing. Restore yourself. Get well again.

Do what must be done to heal. You can’t be the best version of yourself when you are emotionally, mentally, or physically unwell.

Do to the doctor, a therapist, or a spiritual healer. Repair your broken parts so your best self can grow.

Your body houses the best version of yourself. Your body is beautiful and miraculous. Support your body as it serves you by staying fit and healthy. Get enough sleep and avoid substances that deplete your energy and focus. 

You have serious work to do, so ensure your physical self is in the best shape possible.

Give your body the proper fuel to feel your best to enjoy every moment to the fullest. Junk food, sugar, and other highly processed foods can make you sluggish.

Focus on a Mediterranean diet (or similar diet) to stay alert, energized, and healthy. 

Spend a few minutes in gratitude every day. Remind yourself of even the smallest blessings in your life.

Allow the emotions that accompany everything you are grateful for to rise to the surface and soak yourself in them. This effort will heighten your sense of gratitude and happiness.

Use a gratitude journal or write down gratitude affirmations to reinforce these feelings and help you develop an ongoing gratitude mindset.

Happiness is associated with service. Whether you are simply listening to a friend, giving a hand to a neighbor, or volunteering, serving others provides fulfillment that no other activity can afford.

It doesn’t matter how you do it; just find a way to do it.

You know how good it feels to help someone and how it boosts your mood as much as it does the person you help. Service must be part of a better you.

Have a beginner’s mindset in all things. Accept that even if you are an expert, there is always more to learn. You can learn from the humblest among us. You can learn new ways of thinking.

You can learn to appreciate many points of view. Stay open to all possibilities with eager expectations.

Once you define the best version of yourself, seek new paths for evolving into that person. Open your mind and heart to wise people and mentors. 

Face any hard truths about yourself or others. Be relentless in your personal evolution, but relish and celebrate each new level of growth.

Regularly hit the refresh button on your definition of your best self. As we evolve, change, and grow as individuals, even our vision of our best self shifts and evolves along with us. 

Be content with being your best self in each moment — because you will always be in the process of becoming. Make each moment your destination.

Remember, the journey to becoming the best version of yourself is not always easy, but it’s worth it. Each step you take toward personal evolution is closer to a more fulfilling and authentic life. 

Stay committed to your values, prioritize what’s most important, and find joy in the process. With persistence and determination, you can overcome obstacles and achieve your vision for yourself.

So, go ahead and embrace the journey – your best self is waiting for you!

Essay Papers Writing Online

Tips for crafting a compelling and authentic personal essay.

Writing an essay about yourself can be a daunting task, but when done right, it can be a powerful tool to showcase who you are and what makes you unique. Whether you’re applying for college, a scholarship, or a job, a well-crafted essay can help you stand out from the crowd and leave a lasting impression on the reader.

When writing a personal essay, it’s important to strike a balance between being informative and engaging. You want to provide the reader with insight into your background, experiences, and goals, while also keeping them interested and invested in your story. In this guide, we’ll walk you through the process of writing a compelling essay about yourself, from brainstorming ideas to polishing your final draft.

Essential Tips for Crafting

When crafting a compelling essay about yourself, it is important to think about your audience and what message you want to convey. Here are some essential tips to help you create an engaging and authentic essay:

A Powerful Personal Essay

Writing a powerful personal essay is a way to express your unique voice and share your personal experiences with the world. By weaving together your thoughts, emotions, and reflections, you can create a compelling narrative that resonates with your audience. To craft a powerful personal essay, start by reflecting on your own experiences and exploring the themes that matter to you. Pay attention to the details and emotions that make your story come alive. Be honest and vulnerable in your writing, as authenticity is key to connecting with your readers. Additionally, consider the structure of your essay and how you can effectively organize your thoughts to engage your audience from beginning to end. By following these tips and staying true to your voice, you can create a powerful personal essay that leaves a lasting impact on your readers.

Choose a Unique Aspect

When writing an essay about yourself, it’s important to focus on a unique aspect of your personality or experiences that sets you apart from others. This could be a specific skill, talent, or life experience that has had a significant impact on your life. By choosing a unique aspect to highlight, you can make your essay more compelling and memorable to the reader. It’s important to showcase what makes you different and showcase your individuality in a way that will capture the reader’s attention.

of Your Personality

When writing about your personality, it’s important to showcase your unique traits and qualities. Describe what sets you apart from others, whether it’s your creativity, resilience, sense of humor, or compassion. Use specific examples and anecdotes to illustrate these characteristics and provide insight into who you are as a person.

Highlight your strengths and acknowledge your weaknesses – this shows self-awareness and honesty. Discuss how your personality has evolved over time and mention any experiences that have had a significant impact on shaping who you are today. Remember to be authentic and genuine in your portrayal of yourself as this will make your essay more compelling and engaging to the reader.

Reflect Deeply on

When writing an essay about yourself, it is crucial to take the time to reflect deeply on your life experiences, values, beliefs, and goals. Consider the events that have shaped you into the person you are today, both positive and negative. Think about your strengths and weaknesses, your passions and interests, and how they have influenced your decisions and actions. Reflecting on your personal journey will help you uncover meaningful insights that can make your essay more compelling and authentic.

Your Life Experiences

When it comes to writing an essay about yourself, one of the most compelling aspects to focus on is your life experiences. These experiences shape who you are and provide unique insights into your character. Reflect on significant moments, challenges you’ve overcome, or memorable events that have had a lasting impact on your life.

• Consider discussing pivotal moments that have influenced your beliefs and values.
• Share personal anecdotes that highlight your strengths and resilience.
• Explore how your life experiences have shaped your goals, aspirations, and ambitions.

By sharing your life experiences in your essay, you can showcase your individuality and demonstrate what sets you apart from others. Be genuine, reflective, and honest in recounting the events that have shaped your journey and contributed to the person you are today.

Create a Compelling

When crafting an essay about yourself, it is essential to create a compelling narrative that captures the attention of the reader from the very beginning. Start by brainstorming unique and engaging personal experiences or qualities that you want to highlight in your essay. Consider including vivid anecdotes, insightful reflections, and impactful moments that showcase your character and achievements. Remember to be authentic and sincere in your writing, as this will resonate with your audience and make your essay more relatable. By creating a compelling narrative, you can effectively communicate your story and leave a lasting impression on the reader.

Narrative Structure

The narrative structure is crucial when writing an essay about yourself. It helps to create a compelling and engaging story that showcases your unique qualities and experiences. Start by introducing the main theme or message you want to convey in your essay. Then, build a coherent storyline that highlights significant events or moments in your life. Use descriptive language and vivid details to bring your story to life and make it more relatable to the readers. Include a clear beginning, middle, and end to ensure that your essay follows a logical progression and captivates the audience throughout.

Emphasize the lessons you’ve learned from your experiences and how they have shaped your character and outlook on life. Connect these insights to your personal growth and development, demonstrating your resilience, determination, and self-awareness. End your essay on a reflective note, highlighting the impact of your journey on who you are today and what you aspire to achieve in the future. By following a strong narrative structure, you can craft a captivating essay that showcases your authenticity and leaves a lasting impression on the readers.

Highlight Your

When writing an essay about yourself, it is essential to highlight your unique qualities and experiences that set you apart from others. Consider including personal anecdotes, achievements, strengths, and challenges that have shaped your identity. Focus on showcasing your authenticity and individuality to make your essay compelling and engaging.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Personal Growth and Development — How People Around Are Helping You To Become The Better Version Of Yourself

How People Around Are Helping You to Become The Better Version of Yourself

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3. teach your brain, 5. take a chance, 6. be honest, 7. prioritize.

• Sleeping in an extra hour
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8. Say “Yes” to Life

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Essays About Self: 5 Essay Examples and 7 Creative Essay Prompts

Essays about self require brainstorming and ample time to reflect on who you are. See our top picks and prompts to use in your essay writing.

“Tell me about yourself.” It’s a familiar question we are asked in social situations, job interviews, or on the first day of class. It’s also a customary essay writing topic in schools to prepare students for future career interviews, cover letters, and, most importantly, to assist individuals in assessing their personalities. 

Self refers to qualities of one’s identity or character. It’s a broad topic, but many find it confusing. Before your get started on this topic, learn how to write personal essays to make this challenging topic easier to tackle.

5 Essay Examples

1. essay on defining self by anonymous on wowessays.com, 2. long essay on about myself by prasanna, 3. self discovery: my journey to understanding myself and the world around by anonymous on samplius.com, 4. how my future self is my hero by anonymous on gradesfixer.com, 5. essay on self-respect by bunty rane, 7 writing prompts on essays about self, 1. who am i, 2. a look at my personality, 3. my life: a self-reflection, 4. my best and worst qualities, 5. reasons to write about myself, 6. overcoming challenges and mistakes, 7. the importance of self-awareness.

“Google provided a definition of self as a “person’s essential being that distinguishes them from others, esp. considered as the object of introspection or reflexive action.” (Google.com, 2013) This may be as simple as this, but the word “self” is far more complicated than the things that make an individual different from other people.”

The author defines self as the physical and psychological way of perceiving and evaluating ourselves, which has two aspects. First is the development of an existential self which includes awareness of being different from others. Meanwhile, the second aspect is when someone realizes their categorical self or that they have the same physical characteristics as others. 

The essay includes three aspects of self-definition. One is sell-image, or how a person views himself. Two is self-esteem, which dramatically affects how a person values ​​and carries himself. And three is the ideal self, where people compare their self-image with their ideal characteristics, often leading to a new definition of themselves.

“Each person finds their mission differently and has a different journey. Thus, when I write about myself, I write about my journey and what makes the person I am because of the trip. I try to be myself, be passionate about my dreams and hobbies, live honestly, and work hard to achieve all that I want to make.”

Prassana divides her essay into sections: hobbies, dreams, aspirations, and things she wants to learn. Her hobbies are baking and reading books that help her relax. She’s lucky to have parents who let her choose her career where she’ll be happy and stable, which is being a traveler. Prasanna finds learning fun, so she wants to continue learning simple things like cooking specific cuisine, scuba, and sky diving.

“High school has taught me about myself, and that is the most important lesson I could have learned. This metamorphosis has taken me from what I used to be to what I am now.”

In this essay, the writer shows the importance of self-discovery to become a better version of yourself. During their high school days, the author was a typically shy and somewhat childish person who was afraid to speak. So they hid in their room, where they felt safe. But as days pass and they grow older, the writer learns to be strong and stabilize their emotions. Soon, they left their cocoon, managed to express their feelings, and believed in themselves.

Because of self-discovery, the author realized they have their thoughts, ideas, morals, likes, and dislikes. They are no longer afraid of mistakes and have learned to enjoy life. The writer also believes that to succeed, and everyone must trust themselves and not give up on reaching their dreams.

“Bold, passionate, humble these are how I envision my hero to be and these are the three people I want to work on, moving forward as I strive to become the self I want to be in the future.”

The essay shows how a simple award speech by Matthew McConaughey moves the writer’s mind and ultimately creates their hero. They come up with three main qualities they want their future self to have. The first is to be someone who is not afraid to take advantage of any opportunities. Next is to stop being content with just being alive and continue searching for their purpose and genuine passion. Last, they strive to be humble and grateful to every person who contributes to their success.

“People with self-respect have the courage of accepting their mistakes. They exhibit certain toughness, a kind of moral courage, and they display character. Without self-respect, one becomes an unwilling audience of one’s failing both real and imaginary.”

Self-respect is a form of self-love. For Rane, it’s a habit of the mind that will never fail anyone. It’s a ritual that makes a person remember who they are. It reminds us to live without needing anyone else’s approval and walk alone toward our goals. Meanwhile, people with no self-respect hate those who have it. As a result, they become weak and lose their identity.

People can describe who you are in many ways, but the only person who truly knows you is yourself. Use this prompt to introduce yourself to the readers. Share personal and exciting details such as your name’s origin, quirky family routines, and your most memorable moments. It doesn’t have to be too personal. You only need to focus on information that distinguishes you from everyone else.

Personality is a person’s unique way of thinking, feeling, and behavior. You can apply this prompt to describe your personality as a student or working adult. Write about how you develop your skills, make friends, do everyday tasks, and many more. Differentiate “self” and “personality” in your introduction to help readers understand your essay content better.

Connect with your inner self and conduct a self-reflection. This practice helps us grow and improve. In writing this prompt, you will need time to reflect on your life to identify and explain your qualities and values. 

For instance, talk about the things you are grateful for, words that best describe you according to the people around you, and areas of yourself that you’d like to improve. Then, discuss how these things affect your life.

Every individual is a work in progress. Although you consider yourself a good person, there are still parts of you that you want to improve. Discuss these shortcomings with your readers. Expound on why people like and dislike these traits. Include how you plan to change your bad characteristics. You can add instances demonstrating your good and bad qualities to make your piece more relatable.

Writing about yourself is a great way to use your creativity in exploring and examining your identity. But, unfortunately, it’s also a great medium to release emotional distress and work through these feelings. So, for this prompt, delve into the benefits of writing about oneself. Then, persuade your readers to start writing about themselves and give tips to help them get started.

For help with this topic, read our guide explaining what is persuasive writing ?

If you want to connect emotionally with your readers, this prompt is the best to use for your essay. Identify and discuss difficult life experiences and explain how these challenging times helped you learn and grow as a person. 

Tip : You can use this prompt even if you haven’t faced any life-changing challenges. The problem you may have encountered can be as simple as finding it hard to wake up early.

Some benefits of self-awareness include being a better decision-maker and effective communicator. Define and explain self-awareness. Then, examine how self-awareness influences our lives. You can also include different types of self-awareness and their benefits to a person.

If you want to try these techniques, check out our round-up of the best journals !

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How to Be a Better Person

We all want to be our best, but many people wonder if it's actually possible to become a better person once you're an adult. The answer is a resounding yes. There are always ways to improve yourself. This answer leads to more questions, however.

How can you improve yourself to be a better person? What is the easiest approach? And what are the most important aspects of self to work on? Taking into account your own well-being as well as the best interests of others, here are some of the most important ways to become a better person. 

Let Go of Anger

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We all experience anger in our lives. Uncontrolled anger, however, can create problems in our relationships and even with our health. All of this can lead to more stress and additional problems, complicating life and keeping us from being our best selves. That's why learning to manage and eventually let go of anger is so important to becoming a better person.

Letting go of anger isn't always easy. But the first step is learning more about recognizing anger and knowing what to do when you feel angry in your life.

Recognizing anger is often simple if you make an effort to notice when you feel upset and decide to manage this feeling rather than denying it or lashing out at others as a way of coping. Focus on noticing when you feel angry and why, and know that there is a difference between feeling angry and acting on that anger. Then, know your options.

You can change your beliefs about what is making you angry. This can work by learning more about the situation, or even reminding yourself there may be things you don't know yet.

Remind yourself that maybe that person who cut you off in traffic was distracted by something challenging in their own life. If a friend seems to be rude to you, inquire about how their day is going and find out if there's more that you don't know.

You can also focus on what your "anger triggers" are, and eliminate them as possible. For example, if you find yourself becoming frustrated and angry when you have to rush, work on making more space in your schedule (even if it means saying "no" a little more), and try to eliminate that trigger. If a certain person makes you angry, try to limit their role in your life if it doesn't work to talk things out with them first.

It's also important to learn to let go of grudges and residual anger from each day. Don't wake up holding a grudge from the night before if you can help it. Focus on forgiveness , even if it means you don't let someone who wronged you continue to have an important role in your life. When you stay in the present moment as much as possible, this becomes easier.

Practicing stress relievers like meditation can also help you to let go of anger. Focus on releasing the hold that the past may have on you. Put your attention to the current moment and it becomes easier to avoid rumination and stay in a good place.

Support Others

Helping others may seem like an obvious route to becoming a better person. We often think of "good people" as those who are willing to sacrifice for others. This, in the minds of many, is what makes a person "good." However, good deeds can also make us better people because of the connection between altruism and emotional well-being.

According to research, it just may be true that it's better to give than to receive. So while you may feel too stressed and busy to extend help to others when it's not absolutely necessary, expanding your ability to focus on the needs of others can really help you as well. It’s true:  Altruism  is its own reward and can actually help you relieve stress.

Studies show that altruism is good for your emotional well-being and can measurably enhance your peace of mind.  

For example, one study found that dialysis patients, transplant patients, and family members who became support volunteers for other patients experienced increased personal growth and emotional well-being.

Another study on patients with multiple sclerosis (MS) showed that those who offered other MS patients peer support actually experienced greater benefits than their supported peers, including more pronounced improvement of confidence, self-awareness , self-esteem , depression, and daily functioning. Those who offered support generally found that their lives were dramatically changed for the better.

In addition to making the world a better place, exercising your altruism can make you a happier, more compassionate person. Because there are so many ways to express altruism, this is a simple route to being a better person, one that is available to all of us every day. This is good news indeed.

Leverage Your Strengths

Losing track of time when you’re absorbed in fulfilling work or another engaging activity, or what psychologists refer to as " flow ," is a familiar state for most of us. Flow is what happens when you get deeply involved in a hobby, in learning a new skill or subject, or in engaging in activities that supply just the right mix of challenge and ease.   

When we feel too challenged, we feel stressed. When things are too easy, we may become bored—either way, finding the sweet spot between these two extremes keeps us engaged in a very good way.

You can experience flow by writing, dancing, creating, or absorbing new material that you can teach others.

What may bring you to that state of being may be challenging for others, and vice versa. Think about when you find yourself in this state most often, and try doing more of that.

The state of flow is a good indicator of whether an activity is right for you. When you're in a state of flow, you're leveraging your strengths, and this turns out to be great for your emotional health and happiness. It's also a very positive thing for the rest of the world because your strengths can usually be used to help others in some way. 

When you learn enough about yourself to know what your best strengths are and find out how to use them for the benefit of others, you're on your way to being a better person, and a happier one as well.

Use the "Stages of Change" Model

Ask yourself: If you had a magic wand, what would you like to see in your future? Ignoring the ideas of how you’ll get there, vividly imagine your ideal life, and what would be included in it.

Take a few minutes to list, on paper or on your computer, the changes and goals that would be included in this picture. Be specific about what you want. It’s okay if you want something that you seemingly have no control over, such as a mate who is perfect for you. Just write it down.

You may follow the lead of many businesses and have a one-year, five-year, and 10-year plan for your life. (It doesn’t have to be a set-in-stone  plan , but a list of wishes and goals.) Keeping in mind what you hope for in your future can help you feel less stuck in the stressful parts of your present life, and help you see more options for change as they present themselves.

There are several ways to focus on change, but the stages of change model can lead you to your best self perhaps more easily than many other paths. This model of change can be adapted to whatever mindset you have right now and can work for most people.

The Stages of Change Model

• Precontemplation : Ignoring the problem
• Contemplation : Aware of the problem
• Preparation : Getting ready to change
• Action : Taking direct action toward the goal
• Maintenance : Maintaining new behavior
• Relapse : Reaffirm your goal and commitment to change

One of the most important parts of this route to change is that you don't push yourself to make changes before you're ready, and you don't give up if you find yourself backsliding—it's a forgivable and even expected part of the process of change. Understanding this plan for making changes can help you to be a better person in whatever ways you choose.

Press Play for Advice on Creating Change

This episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast shares how to use the six stages of change to apply them to your own process of change. Click below to listen now.

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Take Care of Yourself

Stígur Már Karlsson / Heimsmyndir / Getty Images

You may not always have control over the circumstances you face. But you  can  control how well you take care of yourself, which can affect your stress levels and enable you to grow as a person when you face life's challenges.

Self-care is vital for building resilience when facing unavoidable stressors for several reasons. When you're tired, eating poorly, or generally run down, you will likely be more reactive to the stress you face in your life. You can even end up creating more problems for yourself by reacting poorly rather than responding from a place of calm inner strength.

Conversely, when you're taking good care of yourself (both your physical and mental health ), you can be more thoughtfully engaged with whatever comes, use the resources you have in your life, and grow from the challenges you face, rather than merely surviving them.

Taking proper care of your body, soul, and mind can keep you in optimum shape for handling stress. That gives you added resilience to manage those challenges in life that we all face, as well as those that may be unique to you.

Basics of Self-Care

In terms of self-care strategies , there are several that can help, but some of the most important aspects of self-care include the basics:

• Connection with others

Sleep is important for your emotional and physical well-being because too little or poor quality sleep can leave you feeling more stressed and less able to brainstorm solutions to problems you face. Lack of sleep can take a toll on your body as well, both in the short term and in the long run. Poor sleep can even affect your weight.

The same is true with poor nutrition. A poor diet can leave you feeling bloated and tired, and can add extra pounds over time. You need the right fuel to face life's challenges, but when stress hits, it's often the unhealthy food we crave.

Social Connections

Feeling connected to others can help you feel more resilient. Good friends can help you to process negative emotions, brainstorm solutions, and get your mind off your problems when necessary. It's sometimes challenging to find time for friends when you have a busy, stressful life, but our friends often make us better people both with their support and their inspiration.

Finally, it is important to take a little time for yourself. This can mean journaling and meditation, or it can come in the form of exercise or even watching re-runs at home. This is particularly important for introverts , but everyone needs some time to themselves, at least sometimes.

Learn to Be User-Friendly

Our relationships can create a haven from stress, and help us to become better people at the same time. They can also be a  significant source of stress when there is conflict that is resolved poorly or left to fester. The beauty of this is that as we do the work it takes to become a better friend, partner, and family member, it can also be a path to becoming a better person.

To improve your relationships and yourself, learn conflict resolution skills. These skills include being a good listener, understanding the other side when you are in conflict, and anger management techniques .

These things can help us be better versions of ourselves. They can also minimize the stress we experience in relationships, making these relationships stronger. Close relationships usually provide plenty of opportunities to practice these skills as you work on improving them, so you can perhaps even appreciate the opportunities when they arise and feel less upset.

Mental Health Foundation. Cool down: Anger and how to deal with it .

Post SG. Altruism, happiness, and health: It's good to be good . Int J Behav Med . 2005;12(2):66-77. doi:10.1207/s15327558ijbm1202_4

Cheron G. How to measure the psychological "flow"? A neuroscience perspective . Front Psychol . 2016;7:1823. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2016.01823

Sadler-Gerhardt CJ, Stevenson DL. When it all hits the fan: Helping counselors build resilience and avoid burnout . American Counseling Association VISTAS 2012(1).

National Sleep Foundation. How much sleep do we really need?

By Elizabeth Scott, PhD Elizabeth Scott, PhD is an author, workshop leader, educator, and award-winning blogger on stress management, positive psychology, relationships, and emotional wellbeing.

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How to Write a Short Essay About Yourself: Step-By-Step

Updated 06/4/2022

Published 06/19/2020

Yvonne Bertovich

Contributing writer

Cake values integrity and transparency. We follow a strict editorial process to provide you with the best content possible. We also may earn commission from purchases made through affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more in our affiliate disclosure .

Writing or even talking about yourself may not come easily to you. However, for professional or educational reasons, it’s often a necessity. There are other instances when writing about yourself may make more sense, as you can provide the rawest and most honest perspective.

Jump ahead to these sections:

Steps for writing about yourself, tips for writing about yourself creatively or confidently.

• Examples of Things to Write About Yourself

You should feel empowered—not intimidated—in taking on a writing project about yourself. Use it as a way to challenge how you view your own experiences, talents, and more. We’ll discuss some steps for writing about yourself as well as provide a few examples.  

Writing isn’t for everyone, especially when it’s required. As much as you may dislike it, following the steps below can help the process go that much more smoothly.

If you find that following a different order than what we’ve recommended for you works better for your process, feel free to adjust accordingly. 

Step 1: Determine your purpose 

What’s causing you to write this “thing” about yourself? What exactly are you writing? It may surprise you that people write all kinds of pieces for themselves—even writing your own obituary isn’t out of the question anymore. 

The more specific you can get with yourself about your purpose will help the rest of the process. If it’s something stressful, like a college admission essay or a cover letter, try to frame the project in a different light. 

For example, “I’m writing this essay to show people my heart and how passionate I am about removing disparities and barriers in healthcare. I believe in my abilities, and I want to further my education, so I can help heal people.”

Step 2: Ask yourself some questions 

For any good piece of writing, there has to be fact behind it (if even these facts are abstract in narrative or fiction). The best way to gather facts about any subject is to ask a variety of questions, both soft- and hard-hitting. 

You may ask these questions internally, during research, or directly and literally. Treat this question step as a self-interview.

Here are some questions to ask yourself . You may also ask yourself:

• What is my goal of writing this piece?
• What themes or ideas do I want to focus on?
• What are my strengths and weaknesses?
• What are some important lessons I’ve learned?
• What do I want others to know or understand about me?

Step 3: Organize your answers 

After asking yourself the example questions above as well as others, you should be sure to write down your answers and begin organizing them if you haven’t already. 

It may be tempting to just answer your own questions in your head as you go—but don’t. This will just make the writing step more difficult. You may think that you’ll remember every good point or profound thought you come up with, but memory is a tricky thing. 

If you’re working through your questions during a time when you’re not ready or able to sit down and type or scribble them out, at least make some notes in your phone or in a journal so you can have some descriptive hints for later. No matter how big of an epiphany you may have, it’s possible you’ll forget it. 

Step 4: Write a draft 

If your ideas are already fairly organized, writing your draft should come fairly easily to you. The draft process, however, is when you can start spicing things up with anecdotes, your own personal voice, themes, metaphors—all that fun stuff. The point in you writing something about yourself for yourself is for the very reason that you can make it unquestionably you .

Dull, watered-down words or even over-hyped language from a thesaurus plug-in isn’t going to impress anyone. Writing something about yourself (unless the assignment is creative or unorthodox) isn’t the time to act like something you’re not.

All of this being said, don’t stress yourself out too much. Letting your ideas flow freely and then editing or revising them later is how you should approach the process anyway. You don’t want to put too many restrictions on your ideas from the get-go. Warring with yourself about your ideas while writing is only going to tire you out sooner. 

Think about it—you may spend hours trying to write a piece while overthinking that’s no better than a draft you could have written in 30 minutes on the fly. Not being totally in love with your first draft is normal. It just allows you that much more room to improve. 

Step 5: Put your progress aside

Much like during the draft process, it’s very possible to overthink your work after it’s mostly done. If you constantly keep re-reading it or rehashing your ideas in your head, they may start to sound odd, or you may try to add where you need to trim. 

For example, the same concept applies to repeating the same word over and over aloud — it’ll likely start to sound strange or even wrong the more you hear it. This also applies to music — ever play a song you love over and over till you hate it? 

You need to give your words and your brain some time to rest away from each other until you try to make any drastic edits or changes. That being said, you may love what you’ve written already and decide you don’t need to change a thing—that’s great!

Step 6: Review and edit

After your break, you can pick up your writing once again. Read it with a critical eye. Go back and think deeply about your purpose and any provided prompts. Have you answered everything you intended to or are required to?

It’s not uncommon—though devastating—to write an entire piece only to realize you wrote from the wrong frame of reference or focused on the wrong issue. For example, if you were asked to write about a challenge you overcame in your life by following an important virtue, but you only wrote about winning a basketball championship and not the struggle behind it, this may miss the mark. 

If you find a good number of issues in your work, don’t feel tempted to scrap the entire thing. What may work instead is to copy and paste your writing line-by-line into a new document. This way, you can save as much as possible while being sure to resolve even small discrepancies.

Step 7: Finalize your work

After you’ve undergone the brutal process of self-editing (or enlisting help from someone else you trust) you can prepare yourself for the home stretch. Finalizing your work shouldn’t take very long.

Y our process may differ; however, it’ll likely come down to reading over your work a few more times just to make sure you haven’t missed words, punctuation, or proper grammar. 

It’s OK to use this step to feel proud of yourself, too. You may not take a lot of time to reflect on your life and everything you’ve been through—it’s important to practice self-love in this way and celebrate your accomplishments.

Talking or writing about yourself may not be everyone’s cup of tea. For example, did you need to provide a fun fact recently but draw a blank? You’re not alone. In fact, many people have a false assumption that they’re boring. 

On the flip side, perhaps you’re used to talking about yourself, or, at least you’ve got the “fake it till you make it” type of confidence down-pat. However, you too can only benefit from adding a bit more razzle-dazzle to your spiels and writing assignments. Here are a few tips for writing about yourself creatively or confidently.  

Allow yourself space

If you have an upcoming project or writing assignment that has you on edge, consider stepping away. Even if you don’t consider yourself an outdoorsy person, a walk around the block may help you breathe and get your creativity flowing. Naturally, the more sound your idea or angle, the more confident you’ll feel about your upcoming performance.  

Keep that ego in check

An underinflated ego is just as bad as an overinflated one. Pay close attention to your internal dialogue when approaching new projects or writing tasks (or, honestly anything that comes up during your day). How much of what swirls around in your mind is fact? How much of it is just fleeting thoughts or opinions? You are not your thoughts, and you always have choices. Make good ones and be kind to yourself. 

Try this: Instead of thinking to yourself, “Wow, this is a really complex writing assignment. I can’t do this.” Or, “How am I ever going to get into my dream school with this essay? I’m not a strong writer.” 

Change your internal dialogue to, “I have good ideas. I may not have my plan figured out right now, but I’ll get it done,” or, “I have so many great skills to bring to the table and I am very passionate about what’s brought me here. I will convey this the best I can.”

Crowdsource

Sometimes an outside opinion can give us much-needed perspective. Ask your friends, family, loved ones, or coworkers to describe you in a few words or even in abstract ways. Don’t view this as you’re fishing for compliments. Ask your loved ones for honesty, as this insight can only help you when writing about yourself. 

Build up a fuel bank

Pulling inspiration out of thin air may not always be possible. However, if you build up a few reliable sources of inspiration, the next time a project hits, you’ll be prepared. You can fuel your creativity and confidence in a variety of ways. 

For example, you can create certain playlists for different moods, save favorite art or graphics in a digital folder or keep printed versions in your home or office, write down affirmations or notes-to-self in a journal or app, and so on. 

Reflect on past accomplishments and setbacks

Even if you aren’t a fan of journaling, writing about yourself is far easier if you take the time to reflect, if only mentally. If you know you have a deadline to write about yourself in the near future, you may want to physically or mentally jot down a few real-life examples or experiences that come to mind. 

But how do you get in the right headspace to reflect? What if you only witness recurring thoughts about past events while trying to fall asleep? Be sure to practice the first tip in this section: Give yourself some space to think. For once, limit the distractions, keep all other screens put away or turn on your "do not disturb" feature.

Now, think about some past accomplishments or setbacks that may not even seem relevant to the topic of the assignment. You may have an epiphany about unrelated things or discover something about how you operate. For example, you might realize that you feel less nervous in social and professional settings if you call out your anxiety as being excited. 

Examples of Writing About Yourself

Even if you feel super confident about writing about yourself now, we wanted to provide a few short examples to help you get started. Your tone, word choice, and more may differ depending on which piece you’re working on.

Here are some tips for writing or publishing your life story you may also find helpful. 

In a memoir or essay

Those were probably the best and the worst days of my life. I had never felt more happy and never felt more sad. I felt as though I were so close to having everything I had ever wanted, yet it seemed with every step forward, I had to take two steps back. It was exhausting. How did I get through it? To be quite honest, I have no damn idea. 

Perspective helped. I knew I could have had it way worse; I knew that my struggle wasn’t unique. I knew, too, that even when the small wins would come they’d have yet another loss right on their tails. I paid dearly for having too much heart and optimism, so I regularly had to hose myself down with logic and pessimism. 

On your blog or website

If you’re reading this, it’s too late. Just kidding! That’s just a really good Drake album. I wanted to take some time to talk about what’s been going on in my life lately for those of you who are nosey enough to care. Again, kidding, I know some of you really care. I’m so grateful to have even this small following that I have. It’s wild, really. Who would have thought that people want to know what’s going on in my head at any given time? Joke’s on you guys, though, because I don’t fully know all the time. 

I guess I’ll start off by saying that work has been a whirlwind. As you all know, it isn’t an easy time for anyone, so please don’t take this declaration as a complaint. I’m thrilled to still have a job despite everything going on. However, leaving this reflection at just that would be doing both myself and you all a disservice. It’s weak. It doesn’t really describe what’s been going on. Allow me to continue.  

In a college essay

When I was young, my grandmother told me I couldn’t please everyone — that some people just wouldn’t like me for no reason at all. This was very hard for me to swallow at times. What does this have to do with who I am today and why I plan to attend your university? 

Well, this early lesson demonstrates that in order for this world to keep spinning, we all have to be unwavering in our own pursuits. We are ourselves. We can’t be anyone else. In that, we all have the responsibility to bring our unique talents, wisdom, and heart to the table — even when we’re seated across from people who may not like us. 

Sometimes Only You Can Do It

Writing about yourself may always be challenging for you, but who better to do so than who knows you best? If you work through the process in every situation and give yourself some patience, there’s no question that you can’t craft something amazing. You may also be interested in this article about how to write family stories .

Your written words mean more than you think. This becomes a part of your legacy when you're gone, and it's one of the ways you'll be remembered. While many families choose custom urns from Foreverence or even to craft memorial diamonds from Eterneva , your words are something that live after you're gone.

While it might not seem natural at first, learning to write about yourself, your perspective, and your experiences carries a lot of significance. Who knows who might read these words when you're gone?

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More From Forbes

6 powerful ways to be a better version of yourself.

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If you want to do your best work, and have the best time, you have to be the best version of yourself. Consistently, prolifically; the best you. That includes over the long term and the short term. It includes quickly spotting when you’re feeling down and being able to put yourself in a better frame of mind, fast.

6 powerful ways to be a better version of yourself

Here are 6 powerful ways to be a better version of yourself.

Do less but better

If you’re spending your time chasing multiple goals, wearing multiple hats and fulfilling multiple obligations, you’ll certainly be busy but you might not get anywhere. Deliberate and concerted efforts in one direction is how to achieve great things. Directing your energy into multiple projects will mean it is divided.

Find focus. Find a way to say no to some of the things you’re doing, in favour of doing less but doing it better. Train and trust others to take over or remove specific obligations all together. Breathe a sigh of relief and free up space to give your all to fewer things.

It’s the title of a song by HONNE and it’s sterling advice. Smile more. When you smile you signal happiness to your brain, so it starts acting like it’s happy. Smiling tricks your mind into a sunnier disposition. You look nicer, you seem more approachable, people gravitate towards you. You might suddenly realise you’re progressing more effortlessly than before.

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Today’s nyt mini crossword clues and answers for monday, august 5th, slovakian swimmer tamara potocka collapses after paris olympics race.

Smiling implies relaxation, happiness and positive vibes and it can work powerfully alongside assertiveness and decisiveness. Smile at your team, smile at your family, smile in the mirror. Smile at the world, and the world smiles back.

Keep a journal

Life is short, so keep a log. Pick up a journaling habit to be a better you. Develop a heightened sense of awareness as to how you’re feeling and what’s going on. Glean trends and make strategies for direction. Look back over last year’s entries and marvel at how much you’ve changed. It doesn’t matter what you write, it matters that you do it.

Dance like no one is watching and journal like no one will read it. Because they won’t. Communicating thoughts to hand to pen to paper means making sense of the muddled words into your head and writing your own story. For each day you narrate, you choose how to remember it. The version on the page will speak volumes about how to be better.

Ask better questions

Better questions lead to better answers and result in a better you. Instead of, “Why can’t I do this?”, ask, “What would it feel like if I could do this.” One focuses on the problem and one goes to the solution. Instead of, “Why is this a really bad situation?”, ask, “What’s great about this?” Keep asking better question after better question until you find better answers.

Asking better questions of yourself is one thing, but replicate it in your conversations, too. Starting with “how” is often more conducive to an answer than “why”, which can lead to excuses and defensiveness. One looks back, one looks forward. Choose your questions wisely, because they are the root of your conversations and therefore your day and your year.

Guard what you let in

Someone else’s opinion is exactly that. Yet it’s easy to take it to heart and internalise the words. You could find yourself making decisions based on that opinion you heard. It could change who you are and what you do. Each individual operates from their unique view of the world. It’s based on their childhood, outlook and disposition and it’s heavily biased.

Apply a filter and carefully guard what you accept as truth. Question things. This isn’t about being confrontational or hard work , it’s about refusing to take limiting beliefs and specific world views at face value. Start a debate or nod along, it’s up to you. But create some space between it and your mind.

Be honest with yourself

There are likely people, places and things that you see, visit and own that don’t serve the best version of you. It’s situations you have outgrown and only do for the nostalgia, or it’s ways you spend your time that you just don’t want to. Maybe you’ve assigned meaning to something that means it remains in your present when it belongs in the past.

Sound familiar? Make a list and make a change. Be honest with yourself. Dig into the uncomfortable decisions and move forward. Picture the words above your gravestone being, “would have achieved loads but x, y and z got in the way.” Find out what x, y and z are and remove them to become a better you.

From The War Of Art by Steven Pressfield, “Most of us have two lives. The life we live, and the unlived life within us.” Which life are you living, and how can you fulfil the highest expression of what is within you? Baby steps in the right direction turn you into a better version of yourself, ready to smash through ceilings and take on the world.

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How to Be a Better Person: A Guide to Self-Improvement

Last Updated: August 2, 2024 Fact Checked

This article was co-authored by Camber Hill and by wikiHow staff writer, Aly Rusciano . Camber Hill is a numerologist, author, speaker, and the owner of Camber Hill Coaching based in Long Beach, California. For over 37 years, Camber has coached entrepreneurs, creatives, business executives, and professional sports figures. He has also inspired creatives in the entertainment industry such as professional directors, writers, actors, and top radio personalities. Camber’s unique use of numerology allows him to understand the under-current which drives his clients to create long-term solutions and measurable results. His work has been featured in the History Channel's "The Human Calculator," The Los Angeles Times, Palm Springs Life Magazine, and California radio programs. He is also a member of The International Coaching Federations and is a board member of the ICF Orange County's Board of Directors. Additionally, Camber is distinguished as a certified business owner by the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce. There are 20 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 1,754,114 times.

Life can be a whirlwind of responsibilities and stress, but with the right focus, you can start becoming a better person and who you want to be. In this article, we’ll help you learn how to be a better person in a number of different ways. From honoring yourself to doing small acts of kindness, there’s something you can do each and every day to better yourself and grow as an individual. Keep reading to learn how you can embark on your self-improvement journey.

Things You Should Know

• Keep a gratitude journal to be more positive and compassionate.
• Take care of your mental and physical health to brighten your mood and be happier.
• Find healthier outlets for anger, like exercising and doing yoga, to redirect negative emotions.

Set goals for yourself.

• Is there a relationship in your life you want to improve?
• What causes or movements are you passionate about?
• Is there a project you’ve been meaning to finish?
• What do you like to do in your free time?
• Making your goal to “be a better” person may be challenging to define and achieve. Instead, opt for small goals that can help you grow as an individual, like reading a nonfiction book, writing a short story, calling your mom every weekend, or helping someone in need every day.

Practice forgiveness.

• Dwelling on past wrongs can actually increase your blood pressure and heart rate, while forgiveness can help manage and lower stress.

Be empathetic towards others.

• Avoid making assumptions about people and jumping to conclusions.
• Imagine yourself in someone else’s shoes or situation.
• Actively listen to express interest and help someone feel heard.

Give back to your community.

• Aim to practice at least one act of kindness every day. It doesn’t have to be something big or time-consuming. Even leaving a sticky note on a public bathroom mirror saying, “You’re beautiful inside and out!” can make someone’s day.
• When you help others, you get a rush of endorphins that make you feel good. This is known as the “helper’s high.”

wikiHow Quiz: What Kind of Reality Check Do I Need?

Pick a sea creature:, go outside your comfort zone..

• Make a bucket list of things you can do outside of your comfort zone. Then, spend every other weekend checking an activity off the list.
• Ask friends to join you on your adventures for double the fun.
• Experiment with a different routine by going to a different coffee shop for lunch or taking an alternative route to work.
• Don’t be afraid to challenge yourself. The impossible can be obtainable if you put your best foot forward.

Learn something new.

• Sign up for a class you're interested in online or at a library. Maybe that’s an art class or a course on American Literature.
• Read a nonfiction book.
• Listen to a podcast about a topic you want to learn more about, like business, money, culture, or mental health.

Acknowledge your weaknesses.

• For instance, if friends don’t usually come to you for advice, ask yourself why. Do you talk over them or criticize their decisions? Maybe you need to work on being a better listener.
• The more you learn to be flexible and adaptable with your behavior, the better you can care for yourself and those around you.

Control your anger.

• Try redirecting your anger away from yourself and others by going on a walk, doing yoga, or punching a pillow.
• Calm yourself down by taking deep belly breaths and visualizing a relaxing or joyful memory.
• Reconstruct your thinking patterns by avoiding words like “never” or “always” to describe yourself or others.
• Reader Poll: We asked 488 wikiHow readers, and 52% of them admitted that they typically respond to negative emotions by lashing out at others . [Take Poll] Instead, try journaling or taking deep breaths to calm yourself.

Express your feelings respectfully.

• “You never listen to me anymore,” changes to, “I feel that my concerns aren’t being heard.”
• “I hate when you shout at the kids,” changes to, “When you shout at the kids, I feel upset because I want the kids to feel respected.”
• “You’re always grounding me. It’s not fair!” changes to, “I feel like you’re always grounding me, and it upsets me.”

Be grateful.

• Keep a gratitude journal or make a gratitude list to highlight all the things you're thankful for each day, big or small. [11] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source
• Savor surprises by appreciating the thought that was put into them.
• Share what you’re thankful for with others. For instance, if your brother helped you move your couch, let him know how much you appreciate his help. [12] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source

Be patient.

• For instance, maybe you ordered a pizza for family game night, but the deliverer is stuck in traffic. Instead of getting frustrated, recognize that the extra time waiting for your pizza has given you more time to pick out a game. Plus, you’ll probably get a discounted pizza.
• Another example could be that your computer starts updating the moment you want to work. Rather than getting upset, use the extra minutes of downtime to play with your dog, take a walk, or do some tidying up.

Be yourself.

• Enroll in classes that spark your interest to learn a new skill or find a new passion.
• Do things that are meaningful to you to help you feel fulfilled. [15] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source

Take care of yourself.

• Aim to get at least 7 hours of sleep every night to help your mind and body recharge. [17] X Trustworthy Source Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Main public health institute for the US, run by the Dept. of Health and Human Services Go to source
• Eat food that nourishes your mind and body. Aim to eat whole foods, but don’t restrict yourself—it’s okay to have a cookie every now and then!
• Do a form of exercise you enjoy for at least 30 minutes every day. Maybe that’s walking, dancing, hiking, doing yoga, or kickboxing.

Accept that change happens.

• Try your best not to dwell on the past. Instead, focus on the present moment . Change is inevitable, but you can roll with the punches.

Jeffrey Fermin

Focus on chasing your goals with passion—even if they change. Purpose and growth are the seeds of a flourishing life. Define your dreams, work hard to make them real, and keep pushing forward. Life's journey is all about becoming the best version of yourself!

Be kind to yourself.

• Pretend you’re writing a letter to a friend in a similar situation. How would you talk them through it?
• Place your hand over your heart and whisper positive affirmations to yourself when you’re down, like “I am safe,” “I am kind to myself,” and “I am smart and have a big heart.”
• Note your accomplishments and achievements without criticism by responding rationally to self-critical thoughts. Acknowledge where the critic comes from and then prove it wrong in a logical way. [20] X Research source
• Look in the mirror every morning and compliment yourself. You could say something like, “You’re beautiful, no matter what,” or “You have the brightest smile.”

Be Charismatic with this Expert Series

Expert Q&A

• Follow the golden rule “treat others the way you want to be treated” to be a kind person. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0

Tips from our Readers

• Remember that the journey of self improvement never ends. You won't eventually reach a place where you're suddenly "totally better" -- just try to be a little better every day.
• If you haven't found your talent(s) yet, try to find out your family members' talents. Maybe they passed something down to you!
• Be happy for others. You'll feel great and respect yourself more, and others will appreciate your good feelings towards them.
• When you feel stressed out, take a deep breath and think about a way you can handle the situation before reacting.
• Handle things with patience. Try putting yourself in the other person's shoes when you're dealing with someone.
• Being happy rubs off on other people. Even if it's just acting, be happy and it will make others happier, too!
• Respect works both ways. Respect others from the start and they'll respect you, too.
• Choose good friends that accept you for who you are and support you.

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• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/notes-self/201308/how-set-goals
• ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/topic/forgiveness/definition#why_practice
• ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/topic/empathy/definition#what_is
• ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/topic/altruism/definition#what_is
• ↑ https://www.waldenu.edu/programs/psychology/resource/the-pros-and-cons-of-comfort-zones
• ↑ https://collegeinfogeek.com/self-education/
• ↑ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/a-self-improvement-secret-work-on-strengths/
• ↑ http://www.apa.org/topics/anger/control.aspx
• ↑ https://www.bumc.bu.edu/facdev-medicine/files/2011/08/I-messages-handout.pdf
• ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/topic/gratitude/definition#why_practice
• ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/tips_for_keeping_a_gratitude_journal
• ↑ http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/10_steps_to_savoring_the_good_things_in_life
• ↑ https://health.clevelandclinic.org/7-tips-for-better-patience-yes-youll-need-to-practice/
• ↑ https://repository.upenn.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1064;context=mapp_capstone
• ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/five_foolproof_ways_to_feel_more_joy_in_2015
• ↑ https://www.nami.org/Your-Journey/Family-Members-and-Caregivers/Taking-Care-of-Yourself
• ↑ https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about/
• ↑ https://www.fnu.edu/person/
• ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_self_compassion_beats_rumination
• ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/making-change/201107/how-stop-the-self-criticism-and-feel-better-about-you

About This Article

If you want to be a better person, try to control your negative emotions, like anger and jealousy, since this will help you be more compassionate to others and to yourself. Try to empathize with people and imagine what it’s like to feel what they feel so you can be more sensitive to their emotions. For example, if someone is getting frustrated, try to imagine what thoughts and emotions they might be experiencing, so you can understand where they're coming from. Dwelling on the past can often bring you down, so try to forgive others when they make mistakes. For instance, if your boss is blunt with you, let it go, since they're probably under a lot of stress. You can also strive to do random acts of kindness every day, like holding the door open for someone, helping an elderly person carry their shopping, or paying for a stranger’s coffee. For more tips from our Counselling co-author, including how to set goals to improve yourself, read on! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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