essay on the art of listening

The Art of Listening: Communication Skill Essay

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Introduction

Communication is a complex process that involves encoding and decoding of information. Listening, which is one of the communication elements, determines how effective the communication process is. Most people do not know how they can improve their listening skills in order to perfect communication. The process of improving listening requires one to develop a specific point of view to use in evaluating a message’s content.

Among all communication skills, the art of listening is less emphasized. In most cases when dealing with communication skills problems, most people overlook listening (McKelvie, 2009). It is however important for communicators to understand that listening promotes good communication. As a good listener, one is required to differentiate the speaker’s emotional and delivery elements from the substance and content of the message (McKelvie, 2009). Most people are unable to overcome the distraction associated with the speaker’s emotional elements and thus end up receiving the wrong information.

To avoid being distracted by delivery and emotional elements which tend to cover the message’s content, it is important for a listener to learn how to differentiate facts and ideas. Generally, a listener should understand that listening entails more than message delivery. When listening, a listener should be keen to identify the core information. To avoid emotional element distraction, it’s important for a listener to bear in mind that emotional and delivery elements are not included in the message as elements for emphasizing the substance of the message, but rather as elements to help one in identifying the main substance of the message.

According to McKelvie, (2009), a listener should try to identify the content of the message rather than dwelling on how the message is delivered. To avoid distraction by the delivery and emotional elements a listener should develop a habit of developing responses about the issues being discussed from the speaker’s messages. In addition, to be more focused on the message’s content and substance rather than its emotional elements, a listener should always try to find the answers for any questions arising from the speech.

Another way through which a listener can learn how to improve communication is by trying to analyze the message or speech’s content from someone else’s point of view (McKelvie, 2009). Analysing the message using a different person’s point of view increases the listener’s horizon which enables him to have a better understanding of the specific topic. In order to avoid distractions when listening and improve on identifying the message content, a listener should learn when and how to focus on facts. Listeners should always bear in mind that facts are generated from ideas (McKelvie, 2009). Since the process of identifying facts is a complex one, listeners need to learn how to give the speaker undivided attention. Making notes while listening can help a listener improve his listening skills (McKelvie, 2009).

As a way of lowering distraction by the emotional and delivery elements of the message and focus more on the content of the message, a listener should learn how to relate the message delivery system with message content. A good listener should be in a position to differentiate ideas and employ this skill in analyzing the message’s content. A listener should be in a position to identify some of the emotional and delivery elements such as biased perspective and environmental factors that are most likely to cause him to have a distracted attention while listening. One strategy through which a listener can avoid message distractions is by learning to focus mainly on facts rather than ideas (McKelvie, 2009).

McKelvie, R., (2009). Listen Better to improve relationships . Suite101 publishers.

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Husband and Wife (detail, 1945) by Milton Avery. Gift of Mr and Mrs Roy R Neuberger. Photo by Allen Phillips/ Wadsworth Atheneum

The art of listening

To listen well is not only a kindness to others but also, as the psychologist carl rogers made clear, a gift to ourselves.

by M M Owen   + BIO

Writing in Esquire magazine in 1935, Ernest Hemingway offered this advice to young writers: ‘When people talk, listen completely… Most people never listen.’ Even though Hemingway was one of my teenage heroes, the realisation crept up on me, somewhere around the age of 25: I am most people. I never listen.

Perhaps never was a little strong – but certainly my listening often occurred through a fog of distraction and self-regard. On my worst days, this could make me a shallow, solipsistic presence. Haltingly, I began to try to reach inside my own mental machinery, marshal my attention differently, listen better. I wasn’t sure what I was doing; but I had crossed paths with a few people who, as a habit, gave others their full attention – and it was powerful. It felt rare, it felt real; I wanted them around.

As a culture, we treat listening as an automatic process about which there is not a lot to say: in the same category as digestion, or blinking. When the concept of listening is addressed at any length, it is in the context of professional communication; something to be honed by leaders and mentors, but a specialisation that everyone else can happily ignore. This neglect is a shame. Listening well, it took me too long to discover, is a sort of magic trick: both parties soften, blossom, they are less alone.

Along the way, I discovered that Carl Rogers, one of the 20th century’s most eminent psychologists, had put a name to this underrated skill: ‘active listening’. And though Rogers’s work was focused initially on the therapeutic setting, he drew no distinction between this and everyday life: ‘Whatever I have learned,’ he wrote, ‘is applicable to all of my human relationships.’ What Rogers learnt was that listening well – which necessarily involves conversing well and questioning well – is one of the most accessible and most powerful forms of connection we have.

T he paucity of my listening powers dawned on me as a byproduct of starting to meditate. This is not to make some claim to faux enlightenment – simply to say that meditation is the practice of noticing what you notice, and meditators tend to carry this mindset beyond the yoga mat, and begin to see their own mind more clearly. Among a smorgasbord of other patterns and quirks, what I saw was a self that, too often, didn’t listen.

The younger me enjoyed conversation. But a low, steady egoism meant that what I really enjoyed was talking. When it was someone else’s turn to talk, the listening could often feel like a chore. I might be passively absorbing whatever was being said – but a greater part of me would be daydreaming, reminiscing, making plans. I had a habit of interrupting, in the rather masculine belief that, whatever others had to say, I could say better for them. Sometimes, I would zone out and tune back in to realise that I’d been asked a question. I had a horrible habit, I saw, of sitting in silent linguistic craftsmanship, shaping my answer for when my turn came around – and only half-listening to what I’d actually be responding to.

The exceptions to this state of affairs, I began to see, were situations where there existed self-interest. If the subject was me, or material that might be of benefit to me, my attention would automatically sharpen. It was very easy to listen to someone explaining what steps I needed to take to ace a test or make some money. It was easy to listen to juicy gossip, particularly of the kind that made me feel fortunate or superior. It was easy to listen to debates on topics where I had a burning desire to be right. It was easy to listen to attractive women.

Bad listening signals to the people around you that you don’t care about them

On bad days, this attentional autopilot constricted me. On topics of politics or philosophy, this made me a bore and a bully. People avoided disagreeing with me on anything, even trivial points, because they knew it would balloon into annoyance and a failure to listen to their reasoning. In my personal life, too often, I could forget to support or lift up those around me. The flipside of not listening is not questioning – because, when you don’t want to listen, the last thing you want to do is trigger the exact scenario in which you are most expected to listen. And so I didn’t ask my friends serious questions often enough. I liked jokes, and I liked gossip; but I’d forget to ask them the real stuff. Or I’d ask them things they’d already told me a week ago. Or forget to ask about their recent job interview or break-up.

This is where bad listening does the most damage: it signals to the people around you that you don’t care about them, or you do but only in a skittish, flickering sort of a way. And so people become wary of opening up, or asking for advice, or leaning on you in the way that we lean on those people we truly believe to be big of heart.

All of the above makes for rather a glum picture, I know. I don’t want to overstate things. I wasn’t a monster. I cared for people and, when I concentrated, I could show it. I was liked, I made my way in the world, I apparently possessed what we call charisma. Plenty of the time, I listened fine. But this may be precisely the point: you can coast along in life as a bad listener. We tend to forgive it, because it’s common.

Kate Murphy, in her book You’re Not Listening (2020), frames modern life as particularly antagonistic to good listening:

[W]e are encouraged to listen to our hearts, listen to our inner voices, and listen to our guts, but rarely are we encouraged to listen carefully and with intent to other people.

Why do we accept bad listening? Because, I think, listening well is hard, and we all know it. Like all forms of self-improvement, breaking this carapace requires intention, and ideally guidance.

W hen I discovered Rogers’s writings on listening, it was confirmation that, in many conversations, I had been getting it all wrong. When listening well, wrote Rogers and his co-author Richard Evans Farson in 1957, the listener ‘does not passively absorb the words which are spoken to him. He actively tries to grasp the facts and the feelings in what he hears, and he tries, by his listening, to help the speaker work out his own problems.’ This was exactly the stance I had only rarely adopted.

Born in 1902 – in the same suburb of Chicago as Hemingway, three years earlier – Rogers had a strict religious upbringing. As a young man, he seemed destined for the ministry. But in 1926, he crossed the road from Union Theological Seminary to Columbia University, and committed himself to psychology. (At this time, psychology was a field so new and so in vogue that, in 1919, during negotiations for the Treaty of Versailles, Sigmund Freud had secretly advised Woodrow Wilson’s ambassador in Paris.)

Rogers’s early work was focused on what were then called ‘delinquent’ children; but, by the 1940s, he was developing a new approach to psychotherapy, which came to be termed ‘humanistic’ and ‘person-centred’. Unlike Freud, Rogers believed that all of us possess ‘strongly positive directional tendencies’. Unhappy people, he believed, were not broken; they were blocked. And as opposed to the then-dominant modes of psychotherapy – psychoanalysis and behaviourism – Rogers believed that a therapist should be less a problem-solver, and more a sort of skilled midwife, drawing out solutions that already existed in the client. All people possess a deep urge to ‘self-actualise’, he believed, and it is the therapist’s job to nurture this urge. They were there to ‘release and strengthen the individual, rather than to intervene in his life’. Key to achieving this goal was careful, focused, ‘active’ listening.

That this perspective doesn’t seem particularly radical today is a testament to Rogers’s legacy. As one of his biographers, David Cohen, writes , Rogers’s therapeutic philosophy ‘has become part of the fabric of therapy’. Today, in the West, many of us believe that going to therapy can be an empowering and positive move, rather than an indicator of crisis or sickness. This shift owes a great deal to Rogers. So too does the expectation that a therapist will allow themselves to enter into our thinking, and express a careful but tangible empathy. Where Freud focused on the mind in isolation, Rogers valued more of a merging of minds – boundaried, but intimate.

On bad days, I would wait hawk-like for things I could correct or belittle

Active listening, for Rogers, was essential to creating the conditions for growth. It was one of the key ingredients in making another person feel less alone, less stuck, and more capable of self-insight.

Rogers held that the basic challenge of listening is this: consciousnesses are isolated from one another, and there are thickets of cognitive noise between them. Cutting through the noise requires effort. Listening well ‘requires that we get inside the speaker, that we grasp, from his point of view , just what it is he is communicating to us.’ This empathic leap is a real effort. It is much easier to judge another’s point of view, analyse it, categorise it. But to put it on, like a mental costume, is very hard. As a teenager, I was a passionate atheist and a passionate Leftist. I saw things as very simple: all believers are gullible, and all conservatives are psychopaths, or at minimum heartless. I could hold to my Manichean view precisely because I had made no effort to grasp anyone else’s viewpoint.

Another of my old mental blocks, also flagged by Rogers, is the instinct that anyone I’m talking to is likely dumber than me. This arrogance is terrible for any attempt at listening, as Rogers recognises: ‘Until we can demonstrate a spirit which genuinely respects the potential worth of an individual,’ he writes, we won’t be good listeners. Previously, on bad days, I would wait hawk-like for things I could correct or belittle. I would look for clues that this person was wrong, and could be made to feel wrong. But as Rogers writes, to listen well, we ‘must create a climate which is neither critical, evaluative, nor moralising’.

‘Our emotions are often our own worst enemies when we try to become listeners,’ he wrote. In short, a great deal of bad listening comes down to lack of self-control. Other people animate us, associations fly, we are pricked by ideas. (This is why we have built careful social systems around not discussing such things as religion or politics at dinner parties.) When I was 21, if someone suggested that some pop music was pretty good, or capitalism had some redeeming features, I was incapable of not reacting. This made it very hard for me to listen to anyone’s opinion but my own. Which is why, Rogers says, one of the first skills to learn is non-intervention. Patience. ‘To listen to oneself,’ he wrote, ‘is a prerequisite to listening to others.’ Here, the analogy with meditation is clear: don’t chase every thought, don’t react to every internal event, stay centred. Today, in conversation, I try to constantly remind myself: only react, only intervene, when invited or when it will obviously be welcome. This takes practice, possibly endless practice.

And when we do intervene, following Rogers, we must resist the ever-present urge to drag the focus of the conversation back to ourselves. Sociologists call this urge ‘the shift response’. When a friend tells me they’d love to visit Thailand, I must resist the selfish pull to leap in with Oh yeah, Thailand is great, I spent Christmas in Koh Lanta once, did I ever tell you about the Muay Thai class I did? Instead, I must stay with them: where exactly do they want to go, and why? Sociologists call this ‘the support response’. To listen well is to step back, keep the focus with someone else.

A nice example of Rogers’s approach, taken from his career, is his experience during the Second World War. Rogers was asked by the US Air Force to assess the psychological health of gunners, among whom morale appeared low. By being patient, and nonjudgmental, and gentle with his attention, Rogers discovered that the gunners had been bottling up one of their chief complaints: they resented civilians. Returning to his hometown and attending a football game, reported one pilot, ‘all that life and gaiety and luxury – it makes you so mad’. Rogers didn’t suggest any drastic intervention, or push any change in view. He recommended that the men be allowed to be honest about their anger, and process it openly, without shame. Their interlocutors, Rogers said, should begin by simply listening to them – for as long as it took, until they were unburdened. Only then should they respond.

Much like meditating, listening in this way takes work. It may take even more work outside the therapy room, in the absence of professional expectation. At all times, for almost all of us, our internal monologue is running, and it is desperate to spill from our brain onto our tongue. Stemming the flow requires intention. This is necessary because, even when we think an intervention is positive, it may be self-centred. We might not feel it, Rogers says, but, typically, when we offer our interpretation or input, ‘we are usually responding to our own needs to see the world in certain ways’. When I first began to observe myself as a listener, I saw how difficult I found it to simply let people finish their sentences. I noticed the infinite wave of impatience on which my attention rode. I noticed the slippery temptation of asking questions that were not really questions at all, but impositions of opinion disguised as questions. The better road, I began to see, was to stay silent. To wait.

The active listener’s job is to simply be there, to focus on ‘thinking with people instead of for or about them’. This thinking with requires listening for what Rogers calls ‘total meaning’. This means registering both the content of what they are saying, and (more subtly) the ‘ feeling or attitude underlying this content’. Often, the feeling is the real thing being expressed, and the content a sort of ventriloquist’s dummy. Capturing this feeling involves real concentration, especially as nonverbal cues – hesitation, mumbling, changes in posture – are crucial. Zone out, half-listen, and the ‘total meaning’ will entirely elude us.

Everyone wants to be listened to. Why else the cliché that people fall in love with their therapists?

And though the bad listener loves to internally multitask while someone else is talking, faking it won’t work. As Rogers writes, people are alert to the mere ‘pretence of interest’, resenting it as ‘empty and sterile’. To sincerely listen means to marshal a mixture of agency, compassion, attention and commitment. This ‘demands practice’, Rogers said, and ‘may require changes in our own basic attitudes’.

Rogers’s theories were developed in a context where one person is attempting, explicitly, to help another person heal and grow. But Rogers was always explicit about the fact that his work was ‘about life’. Of his theories, he said that ‘the same lawfulness governs all human relationships’.

I think I started off from a lower point; by nature, I think my brain tends toward distraction and self-regard. But one would not need to be a bad listener to benefit from Rogers’s ideas. Even someone whose autopilot is an empathetic, interested listener can find much in his work. Rogers did more than anyone else to explore listening, systemise its dynamics, and record his professional explorations.

Certainly, being a good listener had an impact on Rogers’s own life. As another of his biographers, Howard Kirschenbaum, told me, Rogers discovered that ‘listening empathically to others was enormously healing and freeing, in both therapy and other relationships’. At his 80th birthday party, a cabaret was staged in which two Carl Rogers impersonators listened to one another in poses of exaggerated empathy. The well-meaning gag was a compliment; in a somewhat rare case of intellectuals actually embodying the ideas they espouse, Rogers was remembered as an excellent listener by everyone who knew him. Despite the kind of foibles that can weigh down any life – a reliance on alcohol, a frustration with monogamy – Rogers appears to have been a decent man: warm, open, and never cruel.

That he was able to carry his theories into his life should give encouragement, even to those of us who aren’t world-famous psychologists. Everyone wants to be listened to. Why else the cliché that people fall in love with their therapists? Why else does all seduction start with riveted attention? Consider your own experience, and you will likely find a direct correlation between the people you feel love you, and the people who actually listen to the things you say. The people who never ask us a thing are the people we drift away from. The people who listen so hard that they pull new things out of us – who hear things we didn’t even say – are the ones we grab on to for life.

P erhaps above all, Rogers understood the stakes involved in listening well. All of us, when we are our best selves, want to bring growth to the people we choose to give our time to. We want to help them unlock themselves, stand taller, think better. The dynamic may not be as direct as with a therapist; there is more of an equal footing – but when our relationships are healthy, we want those around us to thrive. Listening well, Rogers showed, is the simplest route there. Be with people in the right way, and they become ‘enriched in courage and self-confidence’. They feel the releasing glow of attention, and develop an ‘underlying confidence in themselves’. If we don’t want this for our friends, then we are not their friends.

Indeed, such is the generosity of active listening that one can view the practice as one that borders on the spiritual. Though Rogers traded theology for psychology in his early 20s, he always maintained an interest in spirituality. He enjoyed the work of Søren Kierkegaard , an existentialist Christian; and, over the years, he had public discussions with the theologians Paul Tillich and Martin Buber . In successful therapy sessions, said Rogers, both therapist and client can find themselves in ‘a trance-like feeling’ where ‘there is, to borrow Buber’s phrase, a real “I-Thou” relationship’. Of his relationship to his clients, Rogers said: ‘I would like to go with him on the fearful journey into himself.’

Perhaps this is a bit rich for you; perhaps you would rather frame active listening as simply good manners, or a neat interpersonal hack. The point is: really listening to others might be an act of irrational generosity. People will eat up your attention; it could be hours or years before they ever turn the same attention back on you. Sometimes, joyfully, your listening will yield something new, deliver them somewhere. Sometimes, the person will respond with generosity of their own, and the reciprocity will be powerful. But often, nothing. Only rarely will people notice, let alone thank you, for your efforts. Yet this generosity of attention is what people deserve.

And lest this all sound a bit pious – active listening is not pure altruism. Listening well, as Rogers said, is ‘a growth experience’. It allows us to get the best of others. The carousel of souls is endless. People have deeply felt and fascinating lives, and they can enfranchise us to worlds we would never otherwise know. If we truly listen, we expand our own intelligence, emotional range, and sense that the world remains open to discovery. Active listening is a kindness to others but, as Rogers was always quick to make clear, it is also a gift to ourselves.

Brains learn from other brains, and listening well is the simplest way to draw a thread, open a channel

Rogers became a hero of the 1960s counterculture . He admired their utopian dreams of psychic liberation and uninhibited communication; late in life, he was drawn to the New Age writings of Carlos Castañeda. All of this speaks to one of the key critiques of Rogers’s philosophy, both during his lifetime and today: that he was too optimistic. Rogers recognised himself that he was, in Cohen’s words, ‘incorrigibly positive’. His critics called him a sort of Pollyanna of the mind, and thought him naive for believing that such simple interventions as empathy and listening could trigger transformation in people. (Perhaps certain readers will harbour similar critiques about my own beliefs as expressed here.)

Those inclined to agree with this assessment of Rogers will probably think that I have overstated the case. Listening as love? Listening as spiritual practice? But in my own life, a renewed approach to listening has improved how I relate to others, and I now believe listening is absurdly under-discussed. Good listening is complex, subtle, slippery – but it is also right here, it lives in us, and we can work on it every day. Unlike the abstractions of so much of ethics and so much of philosophy, our listening is there to be honed, every day. Like a muscle, it can be trained. Like an intellect, it can be tested. In the very same moment, it can spur both our own growth and the growth of others. Brains learn from other brains, and listening well is the simplest way to draw a thread, open a channel. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I couldn’t write nonfiction that anyone else actually wanted to read until I began trying to truly listen.

‘The greatest compliment that was ever paid me,’ said Henry David Thoreau, ‘was when one asked me what I thought, and attended to my answer.’ Left on autopilot, I can still be a bad listener. I’ll interrupt, finish sentences, chivvy people along. I suspect many of the people I know still find me to be, on balance, an average listener. But I try! With anyone I can impact – and especially those whose souls I can help to light up – I follow Rogers; I offer as much ‘of safety, of warmth, of empathic understanding, as I can genuinely find in myself to give.’ And I open myself to whatever I can learn. I fail in my attentions, again and again. But I tune back in, again and again. I believe it is working.

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Essay on Listening Skills

Students are often asked to write an essay on Listening Skills in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Listening Skills

Importance of listening skills.

Listening skills are vital in all aspects of life. They help us understand others, learn new things, and build strong relationships.

Types of Listening

There are different types of listening: active, passive, and empathetic. Each type is useful in different situations.

Improving Listening Skills

To improve your listening skills, pay attention, avoid distractions, and show empathy. Practice also plays a key role in enhancing these skills.

Benefits of Good Listening

Good listeners are successful in personal and professional life. They can solve problems, make better decisions, and foster positive connections.

250 Words Essay on Listening Skills

Introduction, the importance of listening skills.

In an academic setting, students with good listening skills tend to excel as they can understand and retain information more effectively. In professional environments, these skills help in building strong relationships, solving problems, and making informed decisions. They are crucial in team collaboration, as they foster understanding and mutual respect among team members.

Improving listening skills requires conscious effort. It begins with giving undivided attention to the speaker, avoiding distractions, and being genuinely interested in the conversation. It also involves practicing patience, not interrupting the speaker, and providing feedback to ensure understanding.

Active Listening

Active listening is a step further. It involves showing empathy, asking relevant questions, and paraphrasing to confirm comprehension. This not only enhances understanding but also makes the speaker feel valued and heard, strengthening the relationship.

In conclusion, listening skills are an essential part of effective communication. They play a crucial role in academic achievement, professional success, and personal relationships. By practicing active listening, we can enhance these skills and improve our interactions with others.

500 Words Essay on Listening Skills

Listening is an integral part of communication, a skill often overlooked in our fast-paced, technology-driven world. It is more than just hearing the words spoken by another person; it involves understanding and interpreting these words in a meaningful way.

Listening skills are crucial for effective communication and are a fundamental requirement in many professional environments. They can enhance our relationships, improve our understanding of the world, and foster effective problem-solving and decision-making. By actively listening, we can better comprehend others’ perspectives, ideas, and emotions, leading to more empathetic, meaningful interactions.

The Art of Active Listening

Active listening is a more involved form of listening where the listener not only hears the words but also understands and interprets them. It involves giving feedback, such as nodding or paraphrasing, to show understanding. This kind of listening also requires one to avoid distractions, maintain eye contact, and show empathy towards the speaker. Active listening can lead to better understanding, improved relationships, and more effective communication.

Barriers to Effective Listening

Several barriers can hinder effective listening. These include physical distractions, such as noise or discomfort, and psychological distractions, like preconceived notions or emotional bias. Additionally, cultural differences can also pose a challenge, as they can lead to misunderstanding or misinterpretation of the speaker’s words. Overcoming these barriers requires conscious effort and practice.

1. Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness helps us focus on the present moment, making it easier to concentrate on the speaker’s words without being distracted. 2. Provide feedback: Giving feedback, such as nodding or paraphrasing, can show the speaker that you are actively engaged in the conversation. 3. Ask questions: Asking questions not only shows your interest but also helps to clarify any misunderstandings. 4. Respect cultural differences: Understanding and respecting cultural differences can help avoid misinterpretation and foster better communication.

In conclusion, listening skills are a vital part of effective communication. They require active engagement, understanding, and empathy. By practicing active listening and overcoming the barriers to effective listening, we can improve our communication skills, enhance our relationships, and better understand the world around us. Indeed, the art of listening is a skill that, when mastered, can open a world of possibilities and deeper connections.

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The Art of Listening

Awareness | 3 comments

“It is through this creative process that we love and are loved…”

I want to write about the great and powerful thing that listening is. And how we forget it. And how we don’t listen to our children, or those we love. And least of all – which is so important, too – to those we do not love. But we should. Because listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. Think how the friends that really listen to us are the ones we move toward, and we want to sit in their radius as though it did us good, like ultraviolet rays.

This is the reason: When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand. Ideas actually begin to grow within us and come to life. You know how if a person laughs at your jokes you become funnier and funnier, and if he does not, every tiny little joke in you weakens up and dies. Well, that is the principle of it. It makes people happy and free when they are listened to. And if you are a listener, it is the secret of having a good time in society (because everybody around you becomes lively and interesting), of comforting people, of doing them good.

Who are the people, for example, to whom you go for advice?

Not to the hard, practical ones who can tell you exactly what to do, but to the listeners; that is, the kindest, least censorious, least bossy people you know.

It is because by pouring out your problem to them, you then know what to do about it yourself. When we listen to people there is an alternating current that recharges us so we never get tired of each other. We are constantly being re-created. Now, there are brilliant people who cannot listen much. They have no ingoing wires on their apparatus. They are entertaining, but exhausting, too. I think it is because these lecturers, these brilliant performers, by not giving us a chance to talk, do not let this little creative fountain inside us begin to spring and cast up new thoughts and unexpected laughter and wisdom. That is why, when someone has listened to you, you go home rested and lighthearted.

When people listen, creative waters flow

Now this little creative fountain is in us all. It is the spirit, or the intelligence, or the imagination – whatever you want to call it. If you are very tired, strained, have no solitude, run too many errands, talk to too many people, drink too many cocktails, this little fountain is muddied over and covered with a lot of debris. The result is you stop living from the center, the creative fountain, and you live from the periphery, from externals. That is, you go along on mere willpower without imagination.

It is when people really listen to us, with quiet, fascinated attention, that the little fountain begins to work again, to accelerate in the most surprising way. I discovered all this about three years ago, and truly it made a revolutionary change in my life. Before that, when I went to a party, I would think anxiously: “Now try hard. Be lively. Say bright things. Talk. Don’t let down.” And when tired, I would have to drink a lot of coffee to keep this up. Now before going to a party, I just tell myself to listen with affection to anyone who talks to me, to be in their shoes when they talk; to try to know them without my mind pressing against theirs, or arguing, or changing the subject.

Sometimes, of course, I cannot listen as well as others. But when I have this listening power, people crowd around and their heads keep turning to me as though irresistibly pulled. By listening I have started up their creative fountain. I do them good. Now why does it do them good? I have a kind of mystical notion about this. I think it is only by expressing all that is inside that purer and purer streams come. It is so in writing. You are taught in school to put down on paper only the bright things. Wrong. Pour out the dull things on paper too – you can tear them up afterward – for only then do the bright ones come. If you hold back the dull things, you are certain to hold back what is clear and beautiful and true and lively.

Women listen better

I think women have this listening faculty more than men. It is not the fault of men. They lose it because of their long habit of striving in business, of self-assertion. And the more forceful men are, the less they can listen as they grow older. And that is why women in general are more fun than men, more restful and inspiriting. Now this non-listening of able men is the cause of one of the saddest things in the world – the loneliness of fathers, of those quietly sad men who move along with their grown children like remote ghosts.

When my father was over 70, he was a fiery, humorous, admirable man, a scholar, a man of great force. But he was deep in the loneliness of old age and another generation. He was so fond of me. But he could not hear me – not one word I said, really. I was just audience. I would walk around the lake with him on a beautiful afternoon and he would talk to me about Darwin and Huxley and higher criticism of the Bible. “Yes, I see, I see,” I kept saying and tried to keep my mind pinned to it, but I was restive and bored. There was a feeling of helplessness because he could not hear what I had to say about it. When I spoke I found myself shouting, as one does to a foreigner, and in a kind of despair that he could not hear me. After the walk I would feel that I had worked off my duty and I was anxious to get him settled and reading in his Morris chair, so that I could go out and have a livelier time with other people. And he would sigh and look after me absentmindedly with perplexed loneliness. For years afterward I have thought with real suffering about my father’s loneliness. Such a wonderful man, and reaching out to me and wanting to know me! But he could not. He could not listen.

But now I think that if only I had known as much about listening then as I do now, I could have bridged the chasm between us. To give an example: Recently, a man I had not seen for 20 years wrote me. He was an unusually forceful man and had made a great deal of money. But he had lost his ability to listen. He talked rapidly and told wonderful stories and it was just fascinating to hear them. But when I spoke – restlessness: “Just hand me that, will you? … Where is my pipe?” It was just a habit. He read countless books and was eager to take in ideas, but he just could not listen to people.

Patient listening

Well, this is what I did. I was more patient – I did not resist his non-listening talk as I did my father’s. I listened and listened to him, not once pressing against him, even in thought, with my own self-assertion. I said to myself: “He has been under a driving pressure for years. His family has grown to resist his talk. But now, by listening, I will pull it all out of him. He must talk freely and on and on. When he has been really listened to enough, he will grow tranquil. He will begin to want to hear me.”

And he did, after a few days. He began asking me questions. And presently I was saying gently: “You see, it has become hard for you to listen.” He stopped dead and stared at me. And it was because I had listened with such complete, absorbed, uncritical sympathy, without one flaw of boredom or impatience, that he now believed and trusted me, although he did not know this. “Now talk,” he said. “Tell me about that. Tell me all about that.” Well, we walked back and forth across the lawn and I told him my ideas about it. “You love your children, but probably don’t let them in. Unless you listen, you can’t know anybody. Oh, you will know facts and what is in the newspapers and all of history, perhaps, but you will not know one single person. You know, I have come to think listening is love, that’s what it really is.”

Well, I don’t think I would have written this article if my notions had not had such an extraordinary effect on this man. For he says they have changed his whole life.

He wrote me that his children at once came closer; he was astonished to see what they are; how original, independent, courageous. His wife seemed really to care about him again, and they were actually talking about all kinds of things and making each other laugh.

Family tragedies

For just as the tragedy of parents and children is not listening, so it is of husbands and wives. If they disagree they begin to shout louder and louder – if not actually, at least inwardly – hanging fiercely and deafly onto their own ideas, instead of listening and becoming quieter and more comprehending. But the most serious result of not listening is that worst thing in the world, boredom; for it is really the death of love. It seals people off from each other more than any other thing.

Now, how to listen. It is harder than you think. Creative listeners are those who want you to be recklessly yourself, even at your very worst, even vituperative, bad- tempered. They are laughing and just delighted with any manifestation of yourself, bad or good. For true listeners know that if you are bad-tempered it does not mean that you are always so. They don’t love you just when you are nice; they love all of you.

In order to listen, here are some suggestions: Try to learn tranquility, to live in the present a part of the time every day. Sometimes say to yourself: “Now. What is happening now? This friend is talking. I am quiet. There is endless time. I hear it, every word.” Then suddenly you begin to hear not only what people are saying, but also what they are trying to say, and you sense the whole truth about them. And you sense existence, not piecemeal, not this object and that, but as a translucent whole. Then watch your self-assertiveness. And give it up. Remember, it is not enough just to will to listen to people. One must really listen. Only then does the magic begin.

We should all know this: that listening, not talking, is the gifted and great role, and the imaginative role. And the true listener is much more beloved, magnetic than the talker, and he is more effective and learns more and does more good.

And so try listening. Listen to your wife, your husband, your father, your mother, your children, your friends; to those who love you and those who don’t, to those who bore you, to your enemies. It will work a small miracle. And perhaps a great one.

Brenda Ueland

Brenda Ueland, a prolific Minnesota author and columnist, died in 1985 at the age of 93. Her father was a lawyer and judge, her mother a suffrage leader.

Copyright ©1992 by The Estate of Brenda Ueland. Reprinted on Zen Moments by kind permission of: Holy Cow! Press , Box 3170, Mt. Royal Station, Duluth, Minn. 55803. Phone/Fax: 218-724-1653

Photo: Cats – by Ferran Jordà

“The Art of Listening” is from a collection of Brenda Ueland’s essays:

“Strength To Your Sword Arm: Selected Writings”

“The Old Friend You’ve Never Met”

“Reading Brenda Ueland’s essays are like chatting with an old friend. Her description, enthusiasm, and sheer enjoyment of writing permeate every page of this charming book. Each essay is short – between 2 and 4 pages – and deals with a single topic, making it possible to skip between topics rather than read from page one.

Her characters are colorful and wonderfully drawn – you will feel as if you were sitting in the park with her, listening to this marvelous woman telling tales of her amazing life!” Amazon Books – Customer Review

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Beautiful article & so true. Thanks for sharing.

You had me at the kittens.

A wonderful thought provoking article!! Thank you!

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Dennis Lewis

Authentic Breathing, Harmonious Awakening

The Lost Art of Listening

It can be said in general that most people no longer know how to listen–either to one another or to themselves. Though most of us have ears that can hear very well, we do not actually know how to use these ears to listen. Listening has indeed become a lost art. And the results are obvious not just in education, society, business, and politics but also in the very fabric of our individual lives.

To be sure, there are many who teach listening skills for education and business. In a classic and informative article (“Listening to People”) written in the 1950s and published by the Harvard Business Review in 1988 in a collection entitled People: Managing Your Most Important Asset, the authors (Ralph G. Nichols and Leonard A. Stevens) remind us that whereas the average speech rate of the majority of Americans is around 125 words a minute (and, of course, comparable numbers would hold true for other languages as well), the human brain processes words at a much faster rate. When we listen to someone speaking, therefore, we are asking our brain to slow down dramatically in relation to its ordinary speed. This means that we are left with a lot of spare time for thinking, “and the use or misuse of this spare thinking time holds the answer to how well a person can concentrate on the spoken words. … A major task in helping people to listen better is teaching them to use their spare thinking time efficiently.”

Deep Listening

The relationship of thinking to listening is an important subject, not just for individuals but for society as a whole, and one that the authors go into in great depth in relation to developing better listening skills. In this essay, however, we will keep this relationship in mind but our emphasis will be slightly different. Our emphasis will be on listening as a way of self-knowledge and self-transformation. Our emphasis will be on the  being  of the so-called listener. Our emphasis will be on what Thich Nhat Hanh calls “deep listening.”

Deep listening has to do with the very essence of our relationship to ourselves and others. Deep listening requires love, being, and understanding. From the perspective of self-knowledge, self-transformation, and self-realization, to listen deeply means to welcome, to make ourselves fully available to, what is actually taking place now both in and around us. This is only possible, however, when we are inwardly quiet, alert, and sensitive, when we are in a state of receptivity. Deep listening requires a balance between activity and passivity. It requires us to empty our minds without losing them. It requires us to find a “middle ground,” a space in ourselves, where the vibrations of life can enter and be reflected in our consciousness without discrimination, where the forces coming from both outside and inside can be experienced without attachment, fear, interpretation, or judgment.

Deep listening has nothing to do with our so-called will power. It most often begins spontaneously at the very instant we realize that we are not listening, when we see our self-importance puffing up, when we see clearly how our “identification” with our thoughts, feelings, or sensations interferes with what is being said or offered. At that moment, if we continue to be sincere with ourselves and don’t react with inner criticism, we realize that there is something in us–a deeper level of silence, a deeper “self,” a witness–that can include our own thoughts, feelings, and sensations in the process of listening. We also realize that this deeper silence comes into play only when we can confront the truth about ourselves without any judgment, or, in other words, with compassion. It is this inner silence that will not only allow us to hear the subtle nuances of what is being said but will also bring us to a central, more-balanced place in ourselves. For if our attention goes too far outside ourselves we begin to react to the events around us too aggressively, whereas if it goes too far into ourselves we fall asleep or dream. In both instances we lose touch with the subtle dance, the moving interaction, of inner and outer impressions that sustains our lives.

Opportunities to Experiment 

Our day provides us with many opportunities to experiment with listening. From the moment we wake up in the morning and our thoughts and emotions begin to propel us automatically into various activities, to the numerous discussions we have at work, to the intimate conversations we undertake with friends and loved ones, to our own thoughts about the many aspects of our lives, to the various voices within us, we can study listening in many different ways.

One exercise, which is always useful, is to sit quietly when you can and simply turn your auditory attention inward. Listen not only to sounds reaching you from the outside world but also to the various sounds and voices of your own body and psyche. Start by listening to your breathing, especially to the movements of exhalation and inhalation. Once your mind has become quiet enough to follow your breathing, include any sensations and tensions that seem to be speaking to you. Listen to your thoughts. See if you can actually “hear” them emerging out of silence. It is important, however, not to try to analyze what your hear. Simply listen to everything without discrimination.

Another exercise is to listen to yourself as you speak to others. The aim here is to listen to yourself as though you were a stranger whom you wanted to get to know better. For you are a stranger. We are all strangers to ourselves. And when we are confronted with strangers in whom we are interested, what do we do? We listen not only to their words, but also to their intonations. Consciously or unconsciously, we notice where their voice is coming from: is it coming from up high in themselves, their throat or even the top of their head, or lower down from their solar plexus or belly? We also watch their movements and gestures. We sometimes even try to “feel” their atmosphere. In this experiment we are open to perceiving all of these things–but in ourselves. As you listen to yourself in this way, of course, you will see just how much your attachment to your self-image, supported by your habitual thoughts and feelings and expectations, interferes with actually listening.

Letting Go of Expectations & Interpretations

Real listening requires inner relaxation. To listen to ourselves and others means to let go of our own psychological expectations and interpretations and to allow our attention to move in new, spontaneous ways in ourselves, to move toward the unknown. It means to let go of the narrow habits of mind and feeling that block this “free” movement of attention and channel it toward the known. Such habits include, for example, thinking that we know how someone is going to finish their sentence. (We may well know the words they are going to use, but while we’re thinking about these words we probably won’t hear the subtle meaning the speaker may give them.) Real listening means first of all to observe and then to find a way to free ourselves from the mental and emotional noise that arises automatically during the “spare time” we have for thinking, no matter what value we may give to the noise of these thoughts and emotions. Real listening means that we open ourselves to the deep, underlying silence in ourselves, the ground of our own being, and realize that it is only this silence that can truly listen. In real listening, “there is not a you and not another. Call it love.”*

Copyright 2009 by Dennis Lewis.

*Jean Klein,  The Book of Listening ,” (Non Duality Press, United Kingdom, 2008)

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Master the Art of Authentic Listening

3 steps to becoming a more effective listener..

Posted August 25, 2024 | Reviewed by Devon Frye

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• Authentic listening is a skill that can be learned.
• Put your own thoughts to one side so that your attention is completely on the other person.
• It is not just someone's words that we need to attend to but all their feelings and meanings.
• Listen without wanting to change anything about the person.

As my regular readers might know, I often write about the importance of relationships for providing us with the right environment to foster authenticity and good mental health. What isn't always pointed out, however, is the scarcity of such relationships.

The fact is that on a day-to-day basis, many of our relationships are controlling, false, or lacking in understanding. If we want to be more authentic in our dealings with others, listening is a vital ingredient. Fortunately, it's a skill that can be learned—by just about anyone.

Asking more questions in your relationships—How was your day? How did you feel about that?—is an often recommended step in more open and authentic communication. But the most important thing to do when you ask a question is to really listen to the answer.

We all know people whose eyes seem to glaze over as you talk to them; you feel that they are not listening to you but simply waiting for their turn to talk. In fact, many people don’t even wait for a turn to talk but barge straight in. You may even be guilty of this yourself.

Other times, we listen to people with the intention of changing them in some way or getting them to see the situation as we do. As such, we argue with them, plead, scold, encourage, manipulate, insult, or whatever else might work to get the other person to see things as we do. The reason we do this is that disagreements and conflicting views can be stressful for us unless we are authentic in ourselves.

However, the more authentic we are ourselves, the more able we are to tolerate ambiguity, conflict, and disagreement; we might even cherish it as an opportunity to challenge ourselves and our own views. Authentic people can be confronted with challenges without feeling threatened and having to defend themselves.

What Authentic Listening Looks Like

In short, authentic people are good listeners. They don’t pretend to listen while waiting for their turn to talk. They will want to understand better your point of view and how you are feeling; they will ask questions and take responsibility for their actions. Authentic listening involves three aspects:

First, be aware of what’s going on within you.

Authentic listening involves the awareness of what is going on inside yourself. Our own thoughts bubble up and colour the ways we interpret what the other person is saying. Put your own thoughts to one side so that your attention is completely on the other person while they are speaking.

Second, see things from the other person’s point of view.

Authentic listening requires the ability to tune in to the other person’s worldview and see things from their point of view. Once we have put our own stuff away and are no longer focused on ourselves, we can truly pay attention to what the other person is telling us. However, it's not just the words that we need to be attentive to but also everything else happening within them, all their feelings and meanings.

Try to imagine yourself in the shoes of the other person. Look at how they are sitting, their posture; listen to the tone of their voice and imagine what it feels like to be in their shoes right now. Try to understand not only what they are saying but how they are feeling as they are saying it.

Third, listen without wanting to change.

Authentic listening involves the ability to listen without wanting to change anything about the person. As we step into the other person’s world and begin to see things from their point of view, we might wish that things were different in some way for that person. But to authentically listen, we need to do so without trying to make things different.

Listening is not the same as giving advice. Listen without trying to solve any problems; listen only with the intention of understanding. Don’t interrupt. If you feel the need to interrupt, ask yourself why—and unless it’s to clarify your understanding, then don’t.

When you finally have your space to speak, check that you understand what you have just heard. Let the other person know that you are listening—not by telling them you are, but by showing them: paraphrase what you have heard them say, in a way that is open to correction and clarification. The chances are that you will have caught some of what has been said, missed other aspects, and even misunderstood other parts. Summarising what the person has said and being open to hearing how you have not understood everything exactly is the art of authentic listening.

The above is an edited excerpt from my book, Authentic: How to Be Yourself and Why It Matters .

Joseph, S. (2019). Authentic. How to be yourself and why it matters . Piatkus, London.

https://www.authenticityformula.com/

Stephen Joseph, Ph.D. , is a professor of psychology, health, and social care at the University of Nottingham, UK, and author of What Doesn't Kill Us .

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Mastering the Art: Active Listening in a World of Noise and Distractions

This essay about explores the profound significance of active listening in the expansive realm of communication. It emphasizes active listening as an art form, elevating it beyond a mere technique to a purposeful engagement with human expression. In a world inundated with digital distractions, the essay underscores the rarity of active listening, hidden beneath the clamor of rapid responses. It calls for a deliberate shift in perspective, urging individuals to embrace understanding over immediate replies. Non-verbal cues take center stage in this exploration, serving as the silent choreography that nurtures genuine connections. The essay delves into the linguistic acrobatics of paraphrasing and summarizing, portraying them as dynamic tools for shared understanding. Empathy, portrayed as the pulsating heart of active listening, is presented as an emotional journey rather than a mere intellectual exercise. The professional and personal implications of active listening are discussed, portraying it as a maestro orchestrating harmony in leadership and a bridge fostering emotional intimacy in personal relationships. In conclusion, the essay positions active listening not just as a skill but as a guiding beacon to genuine connection in a world where conversations often skim the surface. It extends an invitation to slow down, savor nuances, and immerse oneself in the dance of understanding, emphasizing that true communication is a symphony where every note contributes to the beauty of connection. More free essay examples are accessible at PapersOwl about Active Listening.

How it works

In the expansive realm of communication, where words weave a symphony of voices, active listening emerges as an exquisite art form—a stroke of mastery that distinguishes individuals amidst the crowded landscape of conversations. It transcends the passive reception of sounds, evolving into a purposeful engagement with the intricacies of human expression—a pursuit that elevates the ordinary to the extraordinary.

Envision a world pulsating with digital notifications and ceaseless screen scrolls—a realm where the prowess of active listening becomes a rare gem, concealed beneath the clamor of rapid-fire responses.

In this frenetic pace, where attention is a fleeting commodity, the deliberate act of absorbing another’s words stands out like a masterpiece amidst the whirlwind of noise.

Active listening, far beyond a mere technique, embodies a mindset—a conscious choice to disentangle from the constant hum of distractions. It beckons individuals to plunge into the rich tapestry of conversation, decoding not just the explicit meaning of words but also unraveling the nuanced emotions that pirouette beneath the surface of spoken language.

Breaking free from the urgency of immediate responses, active listening demands a deliberate shift in perspective. It encourages individuals to release the need for swift replies, fostering genuine curiosity about the speaker’s unique perspective. In a world accustomed to instant gratification, this commitment to understanding becomes a beacon in the sea of hasty exchanges.

Non-verbal cues, the silent choreography of human interaction, command the stage in the theater of active listening. A steady gaze, a nod of affirmation—these subtle gestures serve as punctuation marks in a dialogue, infusing depth and resonance. They counteract the superficiality that can plague communication in the era of quick-fire messaging, nurturing a genuine connection that transcends mere words.

Paraphrasing and summarizing, the linguistic acrobatics of active listening, transcend mechanical exercises, evolving into a dynamic interplay of comprehension and reflection. Rephrasing the speaker’s thoughts is akin to deciphering a cryptic code—a way of signaling, “I not only hear your words but grasp the essence of your message.” Summarizing distills the conversation, providing a mirror that reflects the shared understanding between participants.

Empathy, the pulsating heart of active listening, surpasses intellectual exercise, becoming an emotional journey. It demands more than comprehension; it necessitates an immersion in the subtleties of the speaker’s emotions. This shared emotional experience transforms the conversation into a genuine connection where understanding delves beyond the surface and plunges into the depths of human experience.

In professional realms, where leadership sets the rhythm for collaboration, active listening emerges as the maestro orchestrating harmony. Leaders embracing this art not only hear the concerns and ideas of their teams but also create an inclusive symphony where every voice contributes to the collective melody. It transcends mere directives, cultivating an environment where collaboration and innovation flourish.

Personal relationships, delicate tapestries woven with threads of shared experiences, find strength in the fabric of active listening. Beyond the exchange of words lies an intricate pattern of emotional intimacy. In the ebb and flow of personal conversations, active listening becomes the bridge spanning gaps, fostering connections that resonate on a profound level.

In conclusion, active listening is not a mere skill; it’s a beacon cutting through the noise, guiding individuals to the core of genuine connection. In a world where conversations often skim the surface, the depth of active listening becomes a testament to the richness of human interaction. It extends an invitation to slow down, savor the nuances, and immerse oneself in the dance of understanding. As this skill is honed, individuals discover that true communication is not just about words; it’s a symphony where every note, every pause, contributes to the beauty of connection.

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Essays and art by Dan

An essay on the art of listening.

In today’s world, where the constant barrage of information and noise can be overwhelming, the art of effective listening emerges as a critical skill, pivotal not only in fostering personal and professional relationships but also in enhancing overall life quality.

Effective listening goes beyond mere hearing; it involves understanding, interpreting, and responding thoughtfully to the true message being communicated.

Effective listening is indispensable for conflict resolution, team building, and leadership, as it enables the listener to receive and process diverse viewpoints and complex information accurately.

However, several barriers impede effective listening. The prevalence of digital devices and technology offers continuous distractions. Notifications, alerts, and screens vie for attention, making focused listening a significant challenge.

Additionally, personal biases and preconceptions can cloud judgment, leading to selective listening where one hears only what they want to believe. Such barriers not only distort or block the message but also degrade the quality of interactions.

To overcome these obstacles, several practical strategies can be adopted. Active listening, which involves fully concentrating on the speaker, understanding their message, responding, and then remembering what was said, is foundational. This technique can be practiced by maintaining eye contact, nodding, and paraphrasing what the speaker has said to confirm understanding.

Empathy in listening is about putting oneself in the speaker’s shoes, understanding their emotions and perspectives irrespective of one’s personal views. This approach helps in dealing with sensitive topics where emotions run high, ensuring that communication remains open and constructive.

Mindfulness, too, enhances listening skills. By being fully present in the moment, a mindful listener can effectively tune out distractions and focus entirely on the speaker. This level of attentiveness communicates respect and care to the speaker, fostering a deeper connection and understanding.

Mastering the art of listening in a world full of noise is not merely beneficial but essential. It is a skill that requires conscious effort, patience, and practice. Cultivating better listening habits not only enhances personal and professional interactions but also enriches the listener’s life with deeper connections and a greater understanding of the world around them.

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Listening - Free Essay Examples and Topic Ideas

Listening is the act of paying attention to sound or speech with the intention of understanding and comprehending its message. It involves not only hearing but actively engaging with what is being said, processing the information and interpreting its meaning. Effective listening requires mental focus and concentration, as well as the ability to read nonverbal cues such as body language and facial expressions. Good listening skills are essential for effective communication, building relationships, and resolving conflicts. It is a valuable skill to have both in personal and professional lives.

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At the Democratic Convention, a Historic Nomination

What story did the democrats tell about kamala harris and will it be enough to win.

This transcript was created using speech recognition software. While it has been reviewed by human transcribers, it may contain errors. Please review the episode audio before quoting from this transcript and email [email protected] with any questions.

[BACKGROUND CHATTER]

I’m standing in a sea of people coming out of this vast convention. And people are holding signs, smiling. There’s confetti everywhere. There are balloons, white, red, and blue. And there’s a lot of excitement.

From “The New York Times,” I’m Sabrina Tavernise. And this is “The Daily” from inside the Democratic National Convention Hall, where Kamala Harris has just accepted her party’s nomination, becoming the first woman of color in US history to do so.

Today, the story this convention told about Harris and whether that story could be enough to win.

It’s Friday, August 23.

[SERENE MUSIC]

The work and prayers of centuries have brought us to this day. What shall our our legacy be? What will our children say? Let me in my heart, when my days are through, America, America, I gave my best to you.

On night one of the Democratic National Convention, the evening was really defined by this very emotional, quite bittersweet goodbye from President Biden.

And there’s nothing we cannot do when we do it together.

God bless you all. And may God protect our troops.

It was the closing of one chapter so that another could begin. It was Kamala Harris’s moment.

[UPBEAT JAZZ MUSIC]

So right now, it’s 7:40. We are on the floor at the Democratic National Convention. It is a crazy party atmosphere, which is like a massive understatement.

Day two kicked off with delegates gathering on the convention floor, casting their votes in a kind of symbolic way to make Harris the party’s nominee.

This giant festival of lights, people in cowboy hats, people with blinking bracelets, people with Christmas lights wrapped around their hats, heads, shoulders, people wearing donkey hats. I mean, it’s very, very, very celebratory in here.

We need to see that we’re moving on. We are turning a chapter in America.

How do you feel right now?

Awesome, excitement, energized. Ready to win this election.

I love it. I love it. People are just excited, electrified, and they’re just loving it, and they’re happy.

This has been the most electrifying event I’ve ever attended in my life. It’s my first convention. But what a convention to come for, right? To make history right now, as we charge forward to November 5, to elect the first female Black president. I’m excited.

So with Harris now the nominee, a new campaign slogan appeared everywhere. And that was, “A new way forward.” But in a campaign that’s just four weeks old, it was really an open question what “a new way forward” actually meant.

We’re not going back!

We’re not going back! We’re not going back!

And then over the course of the week, as speaker after speaker took the stage, we started to get an answer. The story of forward would be told through the story of Kamala Harris herself. And the question hanging over the week was really whether that story could appeal to a broad majority of Americans, voters outside of the convention hall who will ultimately decide the election.

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

Astead, welcome to the show.

Thank you for having me.

Again. The second time in a week. And I’m very excited for it.

So Astead, we had on the show on Monday to answer a question for us, that I think a lot of people have, which is, who is Kamala Harris? And you ended that conversation by saying that the Democratic Party also recognizes this reality, that for a lot of people, she is still this unknown quantity.

And that the party had a big task here at the convention this week, which was to find a way to finally tell her story. It does seem like they’ve tried to do that. Let’s walk through the case that they’re making for her. And what you’ve seen here in your reporting for your show, “The Run-Up.”

Yeah, I mean, I think that the Democrats have definitely laid out a case for her as a candidate, but also a story for her as a person. They have leaned into the different parts of her biography to really follow through on what, I think, is the best version of her campaign, which is a little bit for everybody. There is a story there about more moderate legislation, but pieces of progressive history. There’s different parts of her bio that speak to Black communities, immigrant communities.

Of course, the historic nature of her gender and the roles like that. And I really think it has followed through on what I expected for this week, which is that she seems to function politically as a mirror of some sort, where the party wants to position her as someone who basically, no matter what you’re looking for in terms of a vessel to beat Donald Trump, you can find it in this candidate.

Let’s dig into that more. Where did the convention start, that story?

Hello, Democrats!

Yeah, I think it really starts in her personal biography.

And I’m here tonight to tell you all about the Kamala Harris that I know.

They have told a story that she often tells about her being a first generation American.

Her mother moved here from India at 19.

And being a daughter of an immigrant mother who really raised two daughters in the Bay Area from working class roots. And that’s been a real thing that they’ve tried to own.

Kamala was not born into privilege. She had to work for what she’s got.

When she was young, she worked at McDonald’s.

They talk about her working at McDonald’s in college.

And she greeted every person without thousand watt smile and said, how can I help you?

I think it’s overall about trying to present this as someone who pulled himself up by bootstraps. It represents the American dream. And I think for Democrats, it really returns them back to the place they want to be. Democrats like thinking of themselves as a party who appeals to the diversity of America, both in racial ways, in gender ways, but also in class ways.

In Kamala Harris, we have a chance to elect a president who is for the middle class because she is from the middle class.

And I think they used other parts of her identity, specifically thinking about being the first Black woman to accept a major party’s nomination.

We know folks are going to do everything they can to distort her truth.

And I think Michelle Obama’s speech, specifically, spoke to the power and anxiety that sometimes that identity can bring.

My husband and I sadly know a little something about this.

For years, Donald Trump did everything in his power to try to make people fear us. See, his limited, narrow view of the world made him feel threatened by the existence of two hard-working, highly educated, successful people who happen to be Black.

And I would also say that it was an implicit response to what Republicans and others have been trying to say, talking about Kamala Harris as a DEI hire, someone who was only in their position because of their identity. But the way that Michelle Obama framed it was that those identities have power.

I want to know. I want to know. Who’s going to tell him, who’s going to tell him that the job he’s currently seeking might just be one of those Black jobs?

Just because someone the first to be in a position, does not mean that is the only reason in the position. But it also doesn’t make those identities meaningless. The fact that she is a Black woman should be seen as a strength, not as a weakness.

Is there a risk to that, though? I mean, by openly talking about race, is there a risk that goes too far and begins to alienate voters outside the convention out in the world who they need to win in November.

I mean, there’s always a risk. But I don’t really think so. Democrats have had increasing trouble with Black voters. There’s been a downturn in Black vote share all the way dating back to 2012.

In Biden’s now suspended candidacy, that was one of the things driving his polling weaknesses was kind of tepid reception from Black voters. A pitch to them is something that is a upside of the Kamala Harris campaign. And the hope that they could consolidate that community is where any Democratic nominee needs to be as a baseline.

We both got our start as young lawyers, helping children who were abused and neglected.

One thing I noticed that came up a lot during the speeches was her background as a prosecutor. How did the party present that part of her biography?

As a prosecutor, Kamala stood up for children who had been victims of sexual abuse.

She put rapists, child molesters, and murderers behind bars.

They talk about it in the way that I think fuels what they want to say is the reason she can take on Trump, that this is someone who has stood up to bullies before, who’s not going to be intimidated easily —

And Kamala is as tough as it comes.

— who’s tough, and who doesn’t shirk away from a challenge.

And she knows the best way to deal with a coward is to take him head on, because we all know cowards are weak. And Kamala Harris can smell weakness.

I think all of that adds up to say, you can trust this person to go up against Donald Trump. You can trust this person to go up against the Republican Party, because she’s not someone who is scared.

She never runs from a fight.

A woman, a fierce woman for the people.

But then, of course, we heard about another side of Kamala Harris, a more personal side.

Yeah, and I think this is the part of Kamala Harris where I think was kind of most missing in the presidential run. Frankly, it’s the part that she keeps most private. She is a warm family member and friend.

Hello to my big, beautiful blended family up there.

And I think what the speech from her husband did was really show and lay that out.

I got married, became a dad to Cole and Ella. Unfortunately, went through a divorce, but eventually started worrying about how I would make it all work. And that’s when something unexpected happened, I ended up with Kamala Harris’s phone number.

He talks about the kind of awkwardness of their first interaction.

I got Kamala’s voicemail, and I just started rambling. “Hey, it’s Doug.”

And I think you have a real kind of sense of their genuine connection to one another.

By the way, Kamala saved that voicemail. And she makes me listen to it on every anniversary.

Like, yes, this is someone who is tough, who is taking on corporations and cartels and all of that stuff by day. But this is someone who also makes a point to cook Sunday dinner for family every week.

And she makes a mean brisket for Passover.

And makes sure to really go close to his kids and is very close with her family.

That’s Kamala. She’s always been there for our children. And I know she’ll always be there for yours, too.

Going back to the last time the Democratic Party nominated a woman, Hillary Clinton, she had presented herself in a very different way. She kind of ran away from that stuff. She was saying, I don’t bake cookies, that’s not what I do. I’m kind of out there with the men, fighting.

And this convention and this candidate, Harris, is very different. She’s a newer generation. And she can do her career and bake cookies. Those things are not in conflict. This is a different type of woman leader.

This week we talked to Senator Elizabeth Warren on “The Run-Up,” and one of the things that she mentioned was she feels that there’s been a big change from 2016, even 2020 to now. Not just the amount of women in public office, but she said they don’t have to choose between sides of themselves. And I think that’s what diversity means.

Of course, Kamala Harris can be a tough politician and also bake cookies. Hillary Clinton did that, too. It was just that she was told that was not the way that she had to present herself. What Kamala Harris is benefiting from is there’s a greater space and ability to choose multiple things at once. And so particularly if others are going to talk more directly about gender or race or other things, that kind of frees her from having the burden of doing that herself.

And in fact, Hillary Clinton, herself, did speak, of course, on day one. She talked about that glass ceiling in the history that has led to now, including her own experience in 2016.

Yeah, I thought the Hillary Clinton speech was really powerful. I think a lot of the speakers put this moment in historical context, both politically and personally.

My mother, Dorothy, was born right here in Chicago before women had the right to vote. That changed 104 years ago yesterday. And since that day, every generation has carried the torch forward. In 1972, a fearless Black congresswoman named Shirley Chisholm —

— she ran for president. In 1984, I brought my daughter to see Geraldine Ferraro, the first woman nominated for vice president. And then there was 2016, when it was the honor of my life to accept our party’s nomination for president.

The last time I was here in my hometown was to memorialize my mother, the woman who showed me the power of my own voice. My mother volunteered at the local school.

I’m the proud granddaughter of a housekeeper, Sarah Daisy, who raised her three children in a one-bedroom apartment. It was her dream to work in government, to help people.

My grandmother, the woman who helped raise me as a child, a little old white lady born in a tiny town called Peru, Kansas.

I want to talk now about somebody who’s not with us tonight. Tessie Prevost Williams was born in New Orleans not long after the Supreme Court ruled that segregated public schools were unconstitutional. That was in 1954, same year I was born. Parents pulled their kids out of the school.

There was a way that I think the candidacy and the person was placed in a long legacy, both about gender identity and racial identity that kind of teed up this Thursday as a culminating moment, both politically and I think, in a broader historical context.

Together, we put a lot of cracks in the highest, hardest glass ceiling. And you know what? On the other side of that glass ceiling is Kamala Harris raising her hand and taking the oath of office as our 47th president of the United States!

I wish my mother and Kamala’s mother could see us. They would say, keep going. Shirley and Jerry would say, keep going!

I think you can do a lot to set up a candidate to be in a good position. All of this stuff adds up to some part of the puzzle, but the biggest piece is the candidate themself. At the end of the day, they have to close the deal. And I think this moment is her chance to tell her own story in a way that sometimes she has not decided to. And that’s still what this whole convention success and failure will ride on.

We’re going to watch tonight. We’re going to watch with our colleague, Reid Epstein. And you are going to have a great episode of “The Run-Up” on Friday. We will all be tuning in.

Thank you. I appreciate you doing this, Sabrina.

Really thanks a lot, Astead.

Are you a delegate?

Sorry, we caught you mid French fry eating. What’s your feeling about Kamala and what her story has been? Are you getting to know her this week? Are there things you’ve learned about her this week?

Yeah, I’m learning more and more as we go along. The more and more I learn about her, the more I’m impressed with her. I mean, she worked at McDonald’s when she was going to college to try to pay her way through.

Her very small beginnings. Not a trust fund baby type of thing. I relate to that. Like, I was on food stamps this year. So it’s like if she can do it with that background, it gives everybody hope.

Hillary was my girl. When Hillary ran, I championed her as well. But I didn’t feel this way as I feel about Harris. I’m like, do I want to run for office? If she can do it, I can. She looks just like me, right? She represents, she works at McDonald’s. She paid for every. It’s relatable. And that’s what everybody needs.

We’re going to break that glass ceiling. I’m getting teary, teary in my eyes. And it just means so much to be inclusive.

[WHIMSICAL MUSIC]

What does it mean to you that Kamala Harris is a woman? What does it mean to you that she’s a Black woman?

To have a Black woman become the president of the United States, and for her to turn the world upside down in 30 days, to know that I’m in the midst of this miraculous history is phenomenal.

One delegate who really stood out to us was Beverly Hatcher, a 76-year-old Black woman from Texas.

I was raised by a wonderful Baptist mama. I just lost her. But I am who I am because of my mother. We were always pushed to do whatever we wanted to do. I’ll never forget. I wanted to be a majorette. I taught myself, because we had no money for, what is it called, lessons

And a majorette is like the baton twirler, right?

Yes. And when I did finally try out in my 11th grade, I won right off. And my classmates, who were predominantly white, as years have gone by, have told me at class reunions and stuff, Beverly, the sleepy town of Wellington woke up.

Oh, my god, we got a Black girl getting ready to be the head majorette. But it happened because I had the drive and the will. My mother and my family stood behind me, and didn’t miss a parade, or a football game, or a basketball game.

And you see that in Harris?

Beverly, what would your mom say if she saw this?

My sisters have been telling me every day how proud my mom is. And I’m just happy. I’m happy to make her happy. Yeah.

We women, who have had mothers like Kamala, like Michelle, I remember Hillary’s mother, we women value their strength and their wisdom. And we’re just glad that they gave us a legacy to pass it on.

Thank you very much.

We’ll be right back.

Reid, hello.

OK. Kamala Harris just wrapped up her acceptance speech. Before we talk about what she said and the case she presented, tell us how her campaign was thinking about the stakes of this moment.

Sabrina, this evening was one of two opportunities, along with the debate next month, for her to speak to tens of millions of people at once. And so for that, the stakes were really high.

Her goal was to present herself as a serious person and a serious candidate, who was not the candidate who flamed out in 2019 or the unsteady vice president from the beginning of her term. She had to show that she had the gravitas to be the commander in chief, the political aptitude to reach out to the middle, and also to progressives in her party all at the same time.

A very tall order. Tell us how she went about doing that.

Good evening, everyone. Good evening.

Well, she started talking around 9:30 Chicago time to a packed United Center with 14,000 or 15,000 people, many, many wearing all white, the color of the suffragettes, a color that makes a statement just by wearing it. And when Harris took the stage —

— they erupted in a cheer that forced her for a couple of minutes to wait before she could start talking.

Thank you. OK, let’s get to business. Let’s get to business. All right.

And what did she finally say once she started talking?

She told the story of her life.

The path that led me here in recent weeks was, no doubt, unexpected. But I’m no stranger to unlikely journeys.

My mother, our mother, Shyamala Harris, had one of her own. And I miss her every day, and especially right now.

She talked about the influence of her mother, who raised her and her sister.

And she also taught us, “And never do anything half-assed.” And that is a direct quote. [LAUGHS]

She spoke about her family’s humble beginnings in Oakland.

Before she could finally afford to buy a home, she rented a small apartment in the East Bay.

Then she started talking about her career as a prosecutor.

In the courtroom, I stood proudly before a judge and I said five words.

She brought back one of the lines that she used in her 2020 campaign about how when she stood up in a courtroom, she began with the same words.

Kamala Harris for the people.

And she said she would bring that same philosophy to the White House, that she was not working for specific individuals, but for the people at large.

And so on behalf of the people —

Eventually she did a bigger wind up to formally accepting the nomination.

— on behalf of every American, regardless of party, race, gender, or the language your grandmother speaks —

And listed the people on whose behalf she did so.

— on behalf of everyone whose story could only be written in the greatest nation on Earth —

It was really a kind of a feat of speech writing to build up to this big emotional moment.

— I accept your nomination to be president of the United States of America.

And what did you make of that, how she was doing that?

It was building up this speech to be a serious political document and present her as a serious figure in this moment. And so she still has to prove to people that she is capable of being the commander in chief and running the country.

And how does she try to prove that she’s capable of being a commander in chief?

What she did was try to draw the distinction between herself and Donald Trump.

In many ways, Donald Trump is an unserious man. But the consequences, but the consequences of putting Donald Trump back in the White House are extremely serious.

And she warns that Trump would not have guardrails on him if he were elected to a second term.

Just imagine Donald Trump with no guardrails.

And how he would use the immense powers of the presidency of the United States not to improve your life, not to strengthen our national security, but to serve the only client he has ever had, himself.

The speech was very clear-eyed about the stakes of the election.

They know Trump won’t hold autocrats accountable because he wants to be an autocrat himself.

There was a whole section in the middle of the speech where she ticked through, one by one, a whole series of warnings about things that Trump would do to the country if he were back in the White House.

Get this, he plans to create a national anti-abortion coordinator and force states to report on women’s miscarriages and abortions.

Simply put, they are out of their minds.

What else stuck out to you?

It was remarkable, the section of the speech where she talked about Gaza.

President Biden and I are working around the clock, because now is the time to get a hostage deal and a ceasefire deal done.

She did not veer too far to the left.

I will always stand up for Israel’s right to defend itself.

She managed to say things that would be appealing to both sides.

President Biden and I are working to end this war, such that Israel is secure, the hostages are released, the suffering in Gaza ends, and the Palestinian people can realize their right to dignity, security, freedom, and self-determination.

It was a remarkable moment to hear the arena erupt at the end of that section, to hear her support for both the Israelis and the Palestinians reveal that kind of enthusiasm, after the party has been really ripped apart for months about how to handle the situation.

Fellow Americans, I love our country with all my heart.

She ended this speech with a paean to patriotism.

We are the heirs to the greatest democracy in the history of the world.

She dove headlong into the American exceptionalism argument that is native to Republicans and to older generations of politicians, like Joe Biden.

It is now our turn to do what generations before us have done. Guided by optimism and faith to fight for this country we love. To fight —

But is not something you always hear from younger Democrats, who are a little less comfortable with some of the flag waving.

Let’s vote for it. And together, let us write the next great chapter in the most extraordinary story ever told. Thank you. God bless you and may God bless the United States of America. Thank you all.

She seemed to really be taking aim at this criticism of her, which is that she’s this radical California liberal and she can’t be trusted with the keys to the country.

I mean, that was one of the tasks that she had tonight, was to make the argument, particularly to voters in the middle, the suburban voters that used to vote for Republicans, but have been repelled by Trump and driven to Democrats in the last several years, that they can vote for her without worrying that she’s some kind of Bernie Sanders acolyte.

And some of that is based on the way she ran her last presidential campaign. Some of it, frankly, is because she’s a Black woman from California. And that the voters who will determine this election are voters in less diverse states, for the most part.

So Reid stepping back here, it feels worth remembering just where we were at the end of the Republican National Convention that was just over a month ago. Things couldn’t have felt more different. The GOP was on top of the world, while the Democrats were in disarray over Biden’s refusal to leave the race.

And now here we are. And it feels like things couldn’t be better for the Democrats. At least that’s the feeling I’m having coming out of this convention.

I mean, the whole race has turned upside down from where it was when we left Milwaukee. And Democrats are upbeat. They are confident. It is a party that is remarkably united behind their candidate.

But you have to remember, this election will be very close. It is, indeed, a game of inches in the key battleground states. And what she was trying to do was to present herself as someone who can be trusted as commander in chief to win over the tiny slices of the electorate that will determine the winner in places like Wisconsin, and Michigan, and Pennsylvania, Georgia, and Arizona.

And those are the states that will determine the election. And they have made a calculated decision that those voters needed to see her as a commander in chief, something they had not seen from her before. And we will see in the coming days and weeks whether she’s accomplished that in a way that brings enough of those people on board for her to win a term as president.

Reid, thank you.

Thank you, Sabrina. [WHIMSICAL MUSIC]

Here’s what else you should know today. On Thursday, the Supreme Court allowed Arizona Republicans, for now, to impose tougher voting requirements, including a new rule that people registering to vote there before the coming election must show proof of citizenship.

As a result, Arizonans newly registering to vote for this year’s presidential election must provide copies of one of several documents, such as a birth certificate or a passport, in order to prove that they are US citizens. Democrats have denounced the new rule as an attempt to prevent legal immigrants from voting.

And US Health officials have approved the latest slate of annual COVID vaccines, clearing the way for Americans six months and older to receive updated shots in the coming days. The approvals come amid a prolonged surge of COVID infections, which have risen all summer.

Remember to catch a new episode of “The Interview” right here tomorrow. This week, Lulu Garcia-Navarro talks with Jenna Ortega, the star of the Netflix series “Wednesday,” and the new “Bettlejuice” sequel, about her head-spinning success over the past few years.

One day I just I woke up in somebody else’s shoes. I felt like I had entered somebody else’s life. And I didn’t know how to get back to mine.

Today’s episode was produced by Lynsea Garrison, Rob Szypko, Jessica Cheung, Asthaa Chaturvedi, and Shannon Lin. It was edited by Rachel Quester, contains original music by Rowan Niemisto, Dan Powell, Diane Wong, and Marion Lozano, and was engineered by Chris Wood. Our theme music is by Jim Brunberg and Ben Landsverk of Wonderly.

[THEME MUSIC]

That’s it for “The Daily.” I’m Sabrina Tavernise. See you on Monday.

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Hosted by Sabrina Tavernise

Featuring Astead W. Herndon and Reid J. Epstein

Produced by Lynsea Garrison Rob Szypko Jessica Cheung Asthaa Chaturvedi and Shannon Lin

Edited by Rachel Quester

Original music by Rowan Niemisto Marion Lozano Dan Powell and Diane Wong

Engineered by Chris Wood

Listen and follow ‘The Daily’ Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Amazon Music | YouTube | iHeartRadio

Last night, at the Democratic National Convention, Vice President Kamala Harris accepted her party’s nomination, becoming the first woman of color in U.S. history to do so.

Astead W. Herndon and Reid J. Epstein, who cover politics for The Times, discuss the story this convention told about Ms. Harris — and whether that story could be enough to win the presidential election.

On today’s episode

Astead W. Herndon , a national politics reporter and the host of the politics podcast “ The Run-Up ” for The New York Times.

Reid J. Epstein , who covers politics for The New York Times.

Background reading

Kamala Harris promised to chart a “new way forward” as she accepted the nomination.

“The Run-Up”: It’s her party now. What’s different?

There are a lot of ways to listen to The Daily. Here’s how.

We aim to make transcripts available the next workday after an episode’s publication. You can find them at the top of the page.

The Daily is made by Rachel Quester, Lynsea Garrison, Clare Toeniskoetter, Paige Cowett, Michael Simon Johnson, Brad Fisher, Chris Wood, Jessica Cheung, Stella Tan, Alexandra Leigh Young, Lisa Chow, Eric Krupke, Marc Georges, Luke Vander Ploeg, M.J. Davis Lin, Dan Powell, Sydney Harper, Michael Benoist, Liz O. Baylen, Asthaa Chaturvedi, Rachelle Bonja, Diana Nguyen, Marion Lozano, Corey Schreppel, Rob Szypko, Elisheba Ittoop, Mooj Zadie, Patricia Willens, Rowan Niemisto, Jody Becker, Rikki Novetsky, Nina Feldman, Will Reid, Carlos Prieto, Ben Calhoun, Susan Lee, Lexie Diao, Mary Wilson, Alex Stern, Sophia Lanman, Shannon Lin, Diane Wong, Devon Taylor, Alyssa Moxley, Olivia Natt, Daniel Ramirez and Brendan Klinkenberg.

Our theme music is by Jim Brunberg and Ben Landsverk of Wonderly. Special thanks to Sam Dolnick, Paula Szuchman, Lisa Tobin, Larissa Anderson, Julia Simon, Sofia Milan, Mahima Chablani, Elizabeth Davis-Moorer, Jeffrey Miranda, Maddy Masiello, Isabella Anderson, Nina Lassam and Nick Pitman.

Astead W. Herndon is a national politics reporter and the host of the politics podcast “The Run-Up.” More about Astead W. Herndon

Reid J. Epstein covers campaigns and elections from Washington. Before joining The Times in 2019, he worked at The Wall Street Journal, Politico, Newsday and The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. More about Reid J. Epstein

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